Not Keeping Up With The Kardashians

This is the happy face of Kris Jenner after some Zesta afternoon delight.

Comes word of a new endorsement deal from Kris Jenner, who has clearly given up on her daughter’s ability to make some dough-ray-mee by signing on to be the spokes-model for a labia cream, Zestra that enhances old lady orgasms. Are you breching (vomit in Yiddish) yet? You sure should be. If not, I am for you. Imagine Grandma Jenner, and no, I do not mean Kris, I mean Bruce, giving all sorts of titillating pleasure to Kris Jenner in their Kalabasas Kompound. The question really is, as true reality television whores, will Kris and Bruce let the cameras roll… Read More »

I'm ready for my close-up, Mr. Anyone Who Will .

Just when you thought it was safe to come out of the water, or from behind a tabloid, comes Kim Kardashian in all her boobalicious glory. Surely she must have been suffering from an acute case of claustrophobia having to hide from the media since leaving that doof-ball after 72 unglorious days of marriage. Kris Jenner must have been keeping her under lock and key as Momager Knows Best. Here is how that exchange went down leading up to this Twitpic.… Read More »

Kris readying for her close-up... again.

This just might be the scariest (and I use the term loosely here) music video…ever. Kris Kardashian Jenner clearly has had her sights on a celebritard career for herself and when you hear her voice, well.. yikes. Since then, she has been (appropriate title) living vicariously though her daughters, which I had suggested in The Days of Kim’s Lives… All Nine of Them. As always, I was right. Also, I guess the talent runs in the family from Kris’ side . Kim clearly inherited her pipes…. and audacity of hope.  … Read More »

The family that prays together (for mountains of cash) stays together.

People are boycotting the Kardashians? Hey, I am the first one to poke fun at the Kardashian family. But over 277,000 people have signed the petition to boycott the Kardashians. That is just insane or inane, which makes these boycotters no better than the Kardashians, ecxept maybe just more jealous. What ever happened to the expression “live and let live”? If you are not into them, then don’t watch their shows or wear leopard print. If you are sick to your stomach from listening to their money making scams? Change the channel, turn the page, click away. Like these boycotters… Read More »

So quiet, you can hear a pin drop.

Patsy and Edina spoof the Kardashians on the new Absolutely Fabulous… Read More »

Barbara Walters' list makes the D-List aspirational.

You cannot believe who is on Baba Wawa’s list for 2011. Fascinating? I call them Fotz-inating. (Etymology of the word Fotz: It started out as a sarcastic reference to something that is or someone that “thinks” they are fascinating. So, it went from, “Oh, you’re fascinating” to “You are fotzinating” to “fotzy balloons” to “fotzy” to the currently, most used…”fotz”.)… Read More »