“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

There is a fantastic article on Christwire.org called Is My Husband Gay? Clearly, this was written by a fag hag or Michele Bachmann. The slogan for Christwire is “Conservative Values for an Unsaved World”. Knowing that will help you digest the article that starts with: Right now in America there are over 2 million couples secretly struggling with homosexuality in their marriages. Are you one of them? Are you having intimacy issues? Are you suspicious about your husband’s late night activities? Or are you oblivious to a problem that could be putting your health and the livelihood of your family… Read More »

A couple of months ago, I made the declaration that I was longer gay…homosexual yes…gay no. Click here to refresh your memory of the 15 plus reasons including: I don’t go to discos on weeknights, well, or most weekends for that matter. I don’t cruise the internet, just write for it. Don’t own any Diesel anything.… Read More »

It’s time for me to chime in on this gay marriage issue. Clearly I am not an opponent nor am I a proponent either. I’m from the school of “live and let live”, so if two gay people want to get married…by all means, make it legal in every state, you have my blessing. I think you’re nuts…but go right ahead. The notion of marriage has always seems a bit archaic to me, straight, gay or otherwise. Monogamy is a challenging notion that defies gravity: that which is forbidden becomes obsession. Yes, there are those lovely exceptions; couples that are… Read More »

It’s hard to find humor in tragedy, especially before any healing has taken hold. But humor has always been my armor, my solace, my Woobie since I was a toddler and I needed to find my funny fast. I was crestfallen, felt so helpless and numb to the news of the day, which would go on to becoming a seminal moment. … Read More »

As a “media outlet?” I Mean What receives some ferocious pitches. And when I say ferocious, I do not mean in a lion that roars kind of way, rather, redonculous hullabaloo of the highest order. One such bibble-babble that I had to share with you below. Like one Mike Ruiz event wouldn’t be enough for the hearty homo this holiday season. Now you too can clusgter fuck up holidays with two riveting festoons. This media pitch is one of the examples of why I recently declared: “I am no longer gay. Homosexual, yes. Gay, no.” As received in my in… Read More »

Having completely forgotten about the screening of Cloud Atlas, coincidentally I happened watch outtakes of Lana Wachowski’s poignant speech from the Human Rights Campaign dinner and was struck by her story. It was not the fact of Lana’s transition but the sensitivity and tenderness when she spoke of her life and the challenges of realizing that you are not in the body you are supposed to be in that touched me so deeply. You see, I posted the Lana Wachowski HRC Dinner speech on Facebook then Tweeted it because we all need to hear Lana Wachowski. We may not all… Read More »

Oh, the good old days. “Do you mind if I call you Jolene?”… Read More »

Whether you are a Real Housewife of Beverly Hills or think that you are on an A-List in Dallas, which frankly is an oxymoron, don’t invite me to lunch.… Read More »

Yet another Gay Pride Weekend filled with cha cha and booze is upon us. Since washboard abs and cheesy music has hijacked the look and tone of what is “gay”, let alone the Manzie fashion filled funways, you can see why I have proclaimed that I am homosexual yes, gay no in the piece I AM ASKING AND I AM TELLING.  However, this season there is provocative and compelling element that will be front and center in the Gay Pride Parade. I am speaking of my friend Lauren Foster, the Miami-based glamour puss, who has chosen to take this moment… Read More »

Let’s face it kids, when I ask: ABE: Who wears a matching red hat with red Prada shoes and elaborate dresses? YOU: Dame Edna? ABE: No. YOU: Any of the contestants on RuPaul’s Drag Race? ABE: No. Give up? Here’s a hint. He turns a blind eye to child molesters and is the top dog of the Catholic church. YOU: Justin Bieber? ABE: No, you maroon. It’s the Pope, the Holy Pontiff, His Grace in the Glass Menagerie. Nice reputation, Marlene Pope Benedict XVI. I mean…really…would you let this guy, if he was not the Pope, anywhere near your kids?… Read More »