More Bla Bla on "kim's lives"

In today’s episode, KIM, KHLOE & KOURTNEY are hanging around the Kardashian Kalabasas Kompound Kitchen doing nothing, contrary to popular belief that what they really do is nothing.… Read More »

A Kardashian source told Gatecrasher in New York Daily News that Kim Kardashian would “live and breathe to hang out with Beyoncé.” Well, duh. You don’t have to be an insider to tell us something so obvi. Anyway, here’s how that all went down.… Read More »

What did I tell you? Three weeks ago, when the Breaking Newzzz of Kim Kardashian‘s unexpected divorce from Kris “The Brick Shit House” Humphries came to light, I predicted that the Kris & Kim divorce will be a major soap opera, which I titled The Days of Kim’s Lives…All Nine of Them. Well, since the dish has started flying, I am changing the name of the soap opera to As The Stomach Turns because this divorce is going to be a doozy. Before the ink is even dry—from the Parker Pen that was pitched to Kim to sign the divorce… Read More »

Oh, this ain’t over, honey. The drama between Kim Kardashian Humphries, née Kardashian & Kris Humphries Kardashian, née Humphries is simply the kick-off to what will be the biggest soap opera saga to hit the airwaves since Luke & Laura from General Hospital. For those of you who don’t know what the hell I am talking about, Luke and Laura were soap opera royalty back in the day and their wedding, which aired on November 17, 1981 was watched by 30,000,000 viewers. Eat that Kim’s Fairytale Wedding: A Kardashian Event in two parts. One part scam and the other part… Read More »

Oooh, Lordie be. The gossip mill is saying that Anna Wintour has banned Kim Kardashian from the Costume Institute Gala. Snap and snap again makes two snaps up. Naturally, we must immediately turn this moment into The Days of Kim’s Loves…All Nine of Them. The Gala Snub Episode.… Read More »

In the last episode titled, A Kardashian Kristmas, rumors were swirling that Kim Kardashian was skulking around with Kanye West. Surely not enough time had lapsed from when Kim ended her measly 72-day marriage to Kris “The Dufus” Humphries. Naturally Archangel Kris Jenner, whose sole reason on Earth is to protect her children, while throwing herself into the spotlight whenever possible, frowned at such a union. That Kristmas morning, Kris Jenner, clad in a leopard print bathrobe available at Sears, was nervously cruising the Internet and was horrified at all the negative comments about her family. Hence her frustration with… Read More »

So here’s the downside for Kanye Kardashian. Um, that’s it.… Read More »

Bummer! AMI, that high-brow publisher news sources such as the Star and Radar Online have backed off the Kardashian Khronicle. Just when I was so looking forward to curling up in my leopard print, fire-retardant Kardashian Snuggie from Sears to catch up on all the lovely (fake) stories that Kris Jenner wanted me to read. Shucks, back to Joan Didion and Chelsea Handler. The news is that Kris was acting like the Momager Bitch From Hell and demanded 100% control of editorial content. “AMI chief David Pecker made it clear that there was no way he was going to tell… Read More »

As the continuing saga of Kris & Kim continues to veer off the course of respectability, the dishy new headline is, Kim Claims That Kris Is Gay in Star magazine, that bastion of truth. The name for this episode is As The Stomach Turns, Episode 4, Say What, Miss Thing?… Read More »

Oh to be a fly on the wall at the Humphries kompound in Minnesota when Kim charged up there to show the paparazzi that she has a heart. And it’s broken. And she needs to redeem herself because she has been spending way too much time reading the many comments on all the blogs depicting her as a douche-bag for leaving Kris. An urgent call from Kris Jenner when Kim was in Australia went something like this:… Read More »