“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

UPDATE TO THE UPDATE: Donald “The Orange-utan” Trump continues to blather on via Twitter and making a bigger fool of himself than humanly possible. Now Trump questions Global Warming on a level that makes any kindergarten student seem like a scientist compared to his lack of understanding. “It’s extremely cold in NY & NJ—not good for flood victims. Where is global warming?” Ugh, embarrassing much? His own kids must be cringing from what a buffoon the Gross Baboon has become. Poor Ivanka Kushner, she is so cool and is stuck sitting next to that tangerine-colored blabber mouth come Celebrity Apprentice–Rehash.

UPDATE: NOVEMBER NO SURPRISE:  Donald “Ass-Clown” Trump continues to trump his better interests by keeping his mouth open and Twitter fingers nimble. The douche bag tweeted, “Now Chrysler wants to send all Jeep manufacturing to China–and will!” A Chrysler executive, Ralph Gilles told Donald Trump in a Tweet on Thursday that the real estate executive and television personality was “full of shit” for repeating a notion that Chrysler is shipping U.S. Jeep production to China, which the automaker refutes. Well I am glad to know I have been calling Donald “The Orange-utan” Trump a Gross Baboon for years now. But I guess it takes a tragedy for people to see what I saw clearly forever. What will it take for Trump to shut his pie hole.

OCTOBER SURPRISE: So the October Surprise has come and gone. What comes as no surprise however is that Gross Baboon nominee Donald “The Orange-utan” Trump, has made a full court press announcement that he is going to make an October Surprise announcement about Barack Obama with the intention to discredit him. Problem is that The Orange-utan has no credibility since his birther embarrassment coupled with the way everyone trashed The Orange-utan at the Washington Correspondents Dinner last year. And all he came up with was the offer to donate money to charity to pursue the birther nonsense. This means that The Orage-utan has been the brunt of a joke for a really long time and will continue to be after today. Recently, Daily Beast columnist Bob Shrum called Donzie a “laughingstock” and was NOT because of his hair or skin color. The Orange-utan’s stupid plan for the Republican Convention to faux fire an Obama look-alike went over like a lead balloon. Well, not even, it was cancelled. Heck, between The Oragne-utan’s antics coupled with Clint Eastwood’s The Old Man and the Empty Chair ridiculousness we can safely say that the Republican Party has become ONE BAD JOKE AFTER ANOTHER!

So the October Surprise is… there is no surprise. What surprises me is:

1. That women would vote for Mitt Romney.
2. That people are not horrified…horrified at the prospect of Paul Ryan–who makes Sarah Palin seem relevant–being a heartbeat away from the Presidency. And no one is saying anything about that!
3. That Barack Obama created over 5,000,000 jobs and the Republicans keep saying he created no jobs.
4. That suburban Jews are in such fear of their wallets that they are willing to deny their gay children…and there’s plenty of them…of their rights.
5. Please add to my list and post your own October Surprise on Twitter.