“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

Guy Trebay wrote an interesting article in The New York Times Style (?) section yesterday. The essence of the story is that men with bellies are on trend, sporting “the Ralph Kramden”. Though it’s called It’s Hip To Be Round, I think the better title is Belly Up. He explores several reasons why this might be the case, and as much as I enjoyed the article because the topic is top of mind (I have been belly conscious my entire life), what he doesn’t address are the critical health issues related to having a belly. As a fat kid, I… Read More »

There is a great article about the Woodstock Music and Art Fair in The New York Times today. It is a sweet love letter to a time gone by… and it made me cry. I was yay close to going to Woodstock, though only 13 years old at the time, because my family summered in the Catskills, nearby Bethel. We were en route that particular weekend, but the news reports kept us sequestered in New Jersey. I watched the news with yearning sadness all weekend, knowing that my spirit was with the Woodstock Nation. It was that defining moment when… Read More »

Ahhh, The Sunday New York Times Style section. My secured ticket to an I Mean…What?!? And it rarely disappoints these days. No matter how lame some of the articles in The Times Style (remember, this an oxymoron) can be, I will never stop reading it because the Sunday Times is everyone who’s anyone’s ritual. And now with these commentaries, it’s my new, improved ritual.… Read More »

You know when you get to a website that says “Under Construction”? Well, it is kind of like that today as I return from Camp (and – mean camp) Gitchya-Gitchya Ya-Ya. It was fun while it lasted and alas, back to reality a.k.a. full on fashion week nonsense. See you manana or later.… Read More »

Being amongst a collection of collagenous junkies out here in Fire Island, where an arrogant puss is as common as sand, it got me to thinking about arrogance in general. Lord knows gays have not cornered the market on that lovely trait, but oh, how they try. Today’s news featured a few arrogant twits. All of them suffering from that terminal illness of believing their own press. And they all have something else in common: flared nostrils, slightly turned up as though they are smelling week-old fish left in the fridge. That is sooo the look of arrogance. Here now… Read More »

Hoola-fontz is a word that appeared on the Gurko vernacular years ago that describes going out partying, flirting heavily or as gays put it “kiki-ing”. And there’s plenty of all of the above going on in Fire Island Pines…to the nth power. Throngs and throngs of people are hoola-fontzing here. Hoola-fontzers you will never want to get into a conversation with, swarming like bees to honey, or in this case…the bar. Anyhoo, how fitting that while surrounded by the unending Marlene parade that the lead stories in the New York Post is about Madonna and the long lost love letters.… Read More »

Officially, I am taking this long weekend to sit quietly and contemplate my navel. Having been invited to the beach on Long Island, it seemed like a great idea. Several weeks ago I did a piece listing the 12 reasons why I was not gay anymore, homosexual yes, gay no. Surely there are more reasons that I chose to omit from that list, but now, sitting here at the Bay Cafe in Fire Island Pines, the list grows…by the minute. Let me start by saying that I have not been out here to the Pines in over 20 years. My… Read More »

There’s nothing better than starting the day with a fresh pot of coffee, my 24-inch MAC (daddy) and all the news of the world. By the end of the first cup, I have read through the top stories of The New York Times, Huffington Post, and the New York Post (loves me my Page Six). Then I segue with my second cup through the Daily Beast, The Guardian, Style.com and a slew of blogs to get me ready for cup three, ’cause by then I have determined what item(s) annoyed me most and then start writing. Today, like every other… Read More »

Last month I did a piece called the Nobody News, which is about a bunch of nobodies…that seem to be somebody…to a bunch of nobodies. If you do not know what I just said, it pretty much sums up our current media fascination with plucked-out-of-obscurity “notables”. That and a couple of “celebrities” thrown into the mix, a.k.a. people I couldn’t care less about. However, do I stand alone? Looking at today’s news reports, it was clear that the Nobody News was aching for a comeback. With that, I give you this.… Read More »

Ahhhh, what a feeling. Women’s Wear Daily proclaimed that orange is the new black for Spring ’10 from the mens’ runways, days and days after I MEAN…WHAT?!? spotted it and even labeled the trend Gina Lollobrigida Orange. Click here to see all the I MEAN…WHAT?!? reportage from Milan and Paris mens’ shows. The other trend WWD spotted was also, right up there in each and every I MEAN…WHAT?!? fashion entry known as Manzie, but they call it something else, “Boys of Summer”. Now, scroll down and tell me that: A) If boys wore these outfits, they would not be shit… Read More »