Last Five Minutes of Fame
You know exactly what I am about to talk about: the endless coverage of the White House Party Crashers and Tiger Woods and His Stream of Dancing Ho’s. Unfortunately, these stories are not going anywhere for the next foreseeable future. Yikes, what’s Babba Wawwa (Barbara Walters) to do? Do you think she could quickly grab Tiger Woods or the tragically-desperate-for-fame couple Tareq and Michaele Salahi as her last two entries for 10 Most Fascinating People of 2009? She needs ratings!!! All I know is that The Insider spent a full half-hour on Tiger‘s penis. Eeny meeny miney mo, catch a… Read More »
The Nobody News
It’s been a while since I did The Nobody News and with the holidays upon us, Lord knows there’s plenty of nobodies buzzing around that need to be recognized here today. The poor dears turn up at events, store appearances and even Jewish weddings. Maybe I just need to get over myself and leave them alone so they can enjoy their moment (if that) in the sun. Nah.… Read More »
Ahhh, the journey of one person’s struggle to become a celebrity. How many of these situations have we watched unfold in front of our eyes. Lost count? I sure have. But I’d like to stop and discuss a few of these people who have hit the airwaves with a thunderous boom and share my perspective. Today’s article in The New York Times Style section about Jesus Luz, Madonna’s boyfriend, is a searing, riveting tale of how one poor, little boy in Brazil made his way to the top of the New York City heap, complete with publicist. Grab your hankies.… Read More »
Far be it from me to not appreciate a good marketing opportunity, but a blatantly gross one is surely worth mentioning, if not brech-ing from. Last night at the American Music Awards, a.k.a. the sell-out awards of the century, Coca-Cola hosted some kind of area that celebs went to in order for Coca-Cola to shnorr up a few photo ops. Naturally, since Pepsi has so effectively aligned themselves with the music industry over the past couple of decades (Michael Jackson, Britney, Mariah, etc.) Coke needed to think fast on garnering some of that limelight, without actually pushing what the music… Read More »
Man does not live by gossip alone. Well, that’s not true either. Sometimes there’s nothing like a good crumb of dish to get you through the day. There are so many levels of dish these days with the feeding frenzy of the internet that fuels innuendo, if not inciting outright lies. Who are we to believe? Who is THE go to source? Just Jared? Perez Hilton? People Magazine? TMZ? Page Six? Gawker? All of the above? None of the above? As for I MEAN…WHAT?!?, what I do as purely a social commentary on all the madness rather than being a… Read More »
What They Really Think
Here’s a game that we can all play together. It’s pretty easy. I will show you a picture followed by a few statements. You select the answer that best fits the person/people and the situation. Easy and fun! A) Now what are we gonna do? B) Look, we’ve gotten this far, surely some stupid publicity scam will keep us in the public eye. C) All of the above. A) One sex tape, even sex tapes. What’s the difference? B) These boobs are all I have left. C) I should have lied to Perez Hilton, God damn it. D) All of… Read More »
Awww. The poor little babies (a.k.a tragic media whores) that think they are all that and a bag of chips by virtue of their being tracked by the tabloid news. You have to love these people for they know not who they are. They only know who they think they are. Then we also have the people who’s media-driven projects that got all sorts of hype but alas, did not live up to the expectations. Cheer up because you have been graced with the honor of being on the I MEAN…WHAT?!? LAST FIVE MINUTES OF FAME LIST. It’s a great… Read More »
Some days there are a slew of silly stories that are worth commenting on. This is one of those days. There is no real theme, no rhyme, no reason. Well, surely there is no reason for these people to be in the news, but since they are, hello fodder. NEWSFLASH!!! Carrie Prejean and Sarah Palin have become friends since the ‘I hate gays (except my mother) speech’. Birds of a feather. NEWSFLASH!!! Carrie Prejean confesses to sex tape on Sean Hannity’s FOX-TV News Show: “It was the biggest mistake of my life-ish.” To read past installments of The Nobody News,… Read More »
The Nobody News
All the News About Nobodies That’s Fit to Print. This surely has become one of my favorite I Mean What?!? entries. The phenomenon that is “People in the News” has been so watered down, that we are now desensitized to actual news about people that are really interesting. Anyway, I’ve explained The Nobody News countless times. It’s just a fact of life that the fast lane is so crowded with wanna be’s.… Read More »
Here we have another edition of Last Five Minutes of Fame. This is an odd week because some of the people on this list are the current obsession of the media. Maybe it is wishful thinking. But I am testing my witching powers to see if by virtue of putting them on the list, if that has an impact on what we will see in the press going forward. Which is such a sad state of media affairs. I heard that Access Hollywood told a publicist that they only way they will cover an event if Jon Gosselin attends. Like… Read More »
