Rupert Everett or Dame Maggie Smith?
There is a saying in Hollywood that if you have a great script and throw it out of your car window onto the 405 Freeway, that it will still end up getting made. That from the head of Paramount Studios who would know, since she used to have the 405 scoured for great scripts by her lackies, I mean her executives. One cannot properly exist in Los Angeles without being able to say, “I am writing a screenplay”. It is practically illegal not to at least be able to say that you and a friend are “collaborating on a project”, something that eludes to the tickling of keys in your spare time. Since your great script exists only in your head, you are better off saying that you are “in development” on a project. And while you are at it, you may as well say that it is a project for Brad and Angelina’s long-awaited return to the silver screen together as the follow up to Mr. & Mrs. Smith. It’s a rom-com about two former supermodels unable to find their next job now that they are technically over the hill and neither one can act.
A friend and I are “collaborating” (get that smirk off your face) on a great script, it’s a spoof on James Bond. This time it’s serious. This time he’s gay! Years ago, Rupert Everett was rumored to be attached to a project about a gay secret agent, but once he started in with the fillers and botox, things went horribly awry. Since then, Rupert has starred in numerous BBC costume dramas playing the comic relief and looking an awful lot like Dame Maggie Smith. I remember reading an interview with him where he admitted to feeling invisible in the gay community now that he had hit a certain age, in spite of his celebrity. This proves Carrie Fisher’s adage, “Celebrity is obscurity biding its time.” Only in the case of Rupert Everett, time is of the essence.
To be continued…
