“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

Oh, please with this controversy about the new Elle magazine cover photo featuring Gabourey Sidibe. Yikes. First of all, Essence magazine must be kicking themselves for not putting her on their cover first. Say what you want, she ain’t pretty enough to be on the cover of a fashion / beauty magazine. And I am dying to see how many more issues will sell (such a poet) with Gabourey gracing (for lack of a better word) the cover. W magazine did something like this a couple of years ago by featuring Ugly Betty‘s America Ferrera when that show was popular.… Read More »

There is a huge firestorm brewing over the casting choice for the upcoming movie, Cleopatra: A Life. The role is going to Angelina Jolie…duh…best choice on Earth. Sure beats her taking on the role of Wicked Witch of the West in the Wizard of Oz remake, that’s for sure. So now we are embroiled in a politically correct hub-bub by Essence magazine contributing writer, Shirea Carroll. She by Shirea is up in arms that the role of Cleopatra is going, yet again, to a white actress, in the tradition of Elizabeth Taylor, Claudette Colbert and Vivien Leigh. Ms. Carroll had… Read More »

Did you ever Google yourself? And while you were at it, look up who else shares your birthday? Stop judging me. It’s my birthday, as well as George Clooney, Gabourey Sidibe, Willie Mays, Sigmund Freud, Orson Welles, and Rudolph Valentino’s. I love the company I keep. Since I live in my own head, here’s is a scene from my birthday dinner party. INT. GEORGE CLOONEY’S DINING ROOM – NIGHT GEORGE: Let’s face it, people born on May 6th are amazing. RUDOLPH: My mother used to tell me that all the time. SIGMUND: When did your obsession with MOTHER begin? RUDOLPH:… Read More »

Yesterday, I announced my newest nominee for Gross Baboon of the Year with the news of Jesse James and his uber-skank Michelle “Bombshell” McGee (a.k.a. Skanky McGee, in my book). But the competition continues to be fierce for that award. Today, it’s all about Joslyn James, from the quorum of bosomy broads who diddled with Tiger Woods‘ doodle…or is it doodled with his diddle. Actually, neither, if you go by the salacious texts that poor, little victim of poontang, Joslyn endured…then released to the media…really?!? Who can feel sorry for anyone that makes choices with open eyes and hires someone… Read More »

Phew. Award season is over. Whether you are pleased with the results of the Oscar winners (I am), or the Oscar telecast (I’m not), or the Red Carpet gowns (I’m OK overall) or the constant coverage (I’m exhausted), you have to be somewhat relieved that the barrage of celebrity overload is over…for now. Look, I, too, love celebrity culture, but you have to admit, with the rise in urgency of every award show (including the Razzies), we are now chock-full of Gabourey Sidibe (someone tell her to stop screaming), Jason Reitman (your daddy directed Kindergarten Cop, stop thanking him) and… Read More »

Remember when the Oscars meant something? Families would gather round their one television set, snacks piled high. It was the signature event of the movie industry, when actors still held a mystique because they were so inaccessible. Their lifestyles were imagined rather than paraded for the media, only few would speak out in support of injustices or charitable causes and we were kept at arms length from knowing too much what went on behind closed doors. Boy has that all changed. Now, we know so much about everyone that is nominated for each award, that by the time the Oscar… Read More »