WTF is going on with John Travolta hair? Does he not own a mirror? Is Kelly Preston, his occasional wife, living in another house since the gay rumors have swirled into truths? Are his publicists at Rogers & Cowan so afraid of him that they don’t know how to pull him aside and say, “Look, girl, you look like Esther Williams in a black bathing cap.” Have you seen the new Christmas video with Travolta and Olivia Newton John called I Think You Might Like It? YIKES. Far be it from me to judge any closet case, but one that glops on shoe polish instead of dabbing on a bit of Just For Men for NO MORE THAN FIVE MINUTES needs to be outed just to get him back on Earth, not necessarily back in the closet. John Travolta has crossed (dressed) the line of no return and he needs to see the error of his ways. Not sexually, hair dye wise. When I say he looks all sorts of wrong, at a time when everyone is snickering at his poontang prowessness, then his team needs to be changed. Like yesterday. he needs to buck up and admit he loves smoking a peace pipe and tell Kelly and the L. Ron Hubbards, “Hasta la vista, baby.” Yes, those exact words since Arnold Schwarzenegger and he must go to the same shoe polish master.