Religion Wishes It Was An Opiate

religulous, bill-maker

You wish religion makes you feel as good as a couple of Roxicets.

Religion wishes it was an opiate. There I said it. For starters, opiates make you feel good….at least for a short while. Alas, then the addiction sets in, which is just about the only synergistic value that opiates have with religion. Whether you’re Christian, Jewish, Muslim or all of the above, we can see a trend, and not one as good as a the Little Black Dress. Instead, what we see playing out in the streets lately can be attributed to the negative impact that organized religion has on the minds of the people. The ones that are spewing hateful rhetoric, killing neighbors, beating their wives and lovers, the list goes on. Nowhere do we see in these instances some kind of euphoric, scratchy, delicious buzz that an opiate normally provides—on the eve of the debilitating addiction that is sure to take hold.

I’m an recovering opiate addict and any of the aforementioned religions would be the last place you will see me turning to for solace. Believing in a higher power (that some call God) is one thing. But religion as spewed by hypocritical, sanctimonious preachers who stand on a bully pulpit and declare that sinners are among us are actually the problem, not the answer. You can have your New and Old Testament Bible thumping, Koran hugging lunatics. They don’t channel God or a higher power in many cases. Their interpretation–as in the case of Orlando–is that evil lurks in the hearts and minds of homosexuals. And heck, they should know, because in too many instances those thumpers have fondled the weenies of countless alter boys (or worse), have had adulterous affairs with their congregants and are nothing but guilty of planting the evil seeds of hate and bigotry to those poor souls who feel lost and need something to fill the void of their simple lives.

Karl Marx said, “Religious distress is at the same time the expression of real distress and the protest against real distress. Religion is the sigh of the oppressed creature, the heart of a heartless world, just as it is the spirit of a spiritless situation. It is the opium of the people. The abolition of religion as the illusory happiness of the people is required for their real happiness. The demand to give up the illusion about its condition is the demand to give up a condition which needs illusions.”

Bravo Bill Maher. Your film, Religulous is about to go through a huge Netflix rental surge. His film is spot on, and fatefully astute.

A very gay looking Pastor Steven Anderson has probably licked someone's balls at some point.

A very gay looking Pastor Steven Anderson has surely licked some guy’s balls at some point. Don’t let that tie fool you.

Rachel Maddow reported on some of the shocking responses to the Orlando Massacre from certain Christian leaders that would make your skin crawl. One very gay-looking, Pastor Steven Anderson from the Faithful Word Baptist Church said, “Orlando was good news and bad news. The good news is that fifty sodomites are dead. The bad news? Some of those pedophiles are still alive.” I kid you not. He actually professed, as any closet-case preacher might, “The government should round up all the sodomites, put them up against Donald Trump’s wall and kill them all.”

A much less attractive, yet equally fay-looking pastor from the Verity Church, Roger Imenez said pretty much the same thing. But with such disdain, I was left with the feeling—as was the case with that douchebag who killed forty nine innocent souls at Pulse—that he had been scorned by his male lover for having a sex change, and could no longer enjoy the fruits of his secret homoerotic dalliances.

Pat Robertson, long time gross baboon also chimed in with his old cranky ass to spew his own brand of hateful rhetoric saying, “We Christians can sit on the sidelines and watch as homosexuals and Muslims kill themselves.” Oh, happy days!

We now know that the Orlando shooter Omar Whatever-The-Fuck was deeply conflicted about his own homosexuality and in fear of his moronic, Taliban-loving father who spewed anti-gay atrocious blather on YouTube. This is a peek into how fucked up that whole Muslim religion is. Come on now. The men spend umpteen hours with other men sequestered in men only Mosques and drape yards and yards of black fabric to cover their wives from head to toe? I mean…what…so they can have sex with them and easily fantasize that they’re actually copulating with one of their brethren? Let’s be honest. That whole system reeks of homo-erotica.

Those hideous Orthodox Jews are no bargain when it comes to the hatred of gays either. When I lived in the Meatpacking District in New York City back when it was just meatpackers and Tranny Hookers, I confronted countless Orthodox Rabbi types, complete with Boy George ensembles having anonymous sex in their parked cars. Hypocrisy rules those closet cases. My point: I’d like to take the Talmud, the Koran and the Bible with that heinous Leviticus crap and bitch slap every last one of these haters and watch them burn in hell.

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