“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

The reason I started I Mean…What?!? was to draw attention the nonsense that fills the airwaves. The modern day media frenzy has become the master ill of our time; destroying the lives of Britney Spears or Lindsay Lohan. Granted, they are annoying, but two wrongs don’t make a right. With the media outlets fearing loss of market share and ad revenue, they jump into sensationalist mode where no one is safe, and no story too boring to blabber on ad nauseum.

I speak today of the little goose that Michelle Obama did to the Queen of England’s rear. I would say ass, but ass and Royals doesn’t seem to be appropriate in the same sentence. Unless of course we are talking about our hip-hop, American version of royalty, which would be Rihanna, so to say “Damn, our little princess Rihanna sure got her ass whooped.”

So, Michelle Obama and Queen Elizabeth shared an impromptu moment, a slight gesture which seemed completely relaxed and natural. And this was the hour-long topic on Larry King Live. I mean…what?!? For a whole hour, they kept replaying (seriously, like a gadrillion times) the shot of Elizabeth’s hand of the small of Michelle’s back while Mrs. Obama’s world famous muscular arm rested on the shoulder of Her Royal Highness. Wait, did I noitce a swift grazing of Her Royal Hiney? That must be what all the British Bloviators were in up in arms about. They defend Her Royal Refrigerator as “no one has evey touched the queen, bla bla bla” with such conviction, that its astonishing to see the ferver in which these Royal watches speak. I say “You Go Girl, Miss Elizabeth, you show your watchers just how fab you really are. What a feeling!