“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

Can you name the Bette Davis movie where she says, “What a dump” before I count to ten? 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10. You got it? OK, you win. The first three people to email me the correct answer to abe@imeanwhat.com will receive an I MEAN WHAT?!? trucker hat. Anyhoo, I am way off on a tangent. I went house hunting on Sunday in Los Angeles with a friend who is ready to plunk down $1.5 million dollars on a house. OK…to some, it’s like nothing. But to many, it’s plenty. We saw some lovely, lovely homes. A cool, four bedroom beauty, with original detail work from the 40’s that made me sob. And this hillside, 60’s modern groove-zone with views that also made me sob. You wanna know what really made me sob? Having to come back to New York to the rat race. And when I say rat race…I really mean it. On the flight home, I clicked on a New York Times ad by accident and up popped this monstrosity (below). It is the ad for a “loft” for the same price as the homes I saw the other day. When they say one bedroom loft…the word loft is operative to induce a sense of vast spaciousness. But when you hear Lower East Side…well…fotz. Say what you want about LA you New York haters, but give me a clapboard house in LA over the clap that you will surely get skeeving around that rat trap.