The I Mean…What?!? How-Is-This-News News

As I perused all the headlines and sidelines of  today’s “news” websites, I am amazed at the items that make the grade. It is an ongoing inner battle for whether I want to know things about celebrities, but really not want to know…as in TMI (too much information) or WC (who cares) or my fave new acronym IMW (I mean what). We will never go back to a gentler time if the headlines are filled with celebrity minutia, as in the case of these news stories…which frankly, are so uninteresting…that I am sleeping while writing.

Yes, she's still stunning and has a furniture line. zzzzzzz

Yes, she's still stunning and has a furniture line. zzzzzzz

1) Cindy Crawford Has Cellulite. Really? No kidding, She’s 504 years old.

yowza.

A day at a time girl.

2) Melanie Griffith checks back into rehab. Really? I thought she was still in there. Lord knows we haven’t herd a peep about her in eons. You think that’s why she checked back in?

who cares what he does?

who cares what he does?

3) The Sultan of Brunei (who? what?) got the world’s most expensive haircut…15,000 pounds ($25,000).  Really? Or is he the world’s biggest idiot. Not clear.

Myterious and Spooky

Myterious and Spooky...they're all together ooki...

4) Katie Holmes is designing a new fashion collection as well as vamping up the uniforms for the Church of Scientology. Really? Why not? Aren’t Scientologists vampires anyway? May as well vamp ’em up.

Nice pin choice. But shouldn't it have been on your sleeve?

Nice pin choice. But shouldn't it have been on your sleeve?

5) Chris Brown went clubbing after sentencing. Really? He should have been clubbed…like a seal…by Rihanna..

The show is called Jon and Kate plus 8. Though I would like to re-title it EIGHT IS ENOUGH.

The show is called Jon and Kate Plus 8. But I would like to re-title it EIGHT IS ENOUGH...ALREADY.

6) Jon Gosselin to leave the show. Kate Gosselin to continue. Really? Like she has something else to do? How else can she afford the butcher for her hair? Yikes.

I guess two wrongs make up the Right.

I guess two wrongs make up the Right.

7) Sarah Palin is urging her Facebook friends/fans to watch Glenn Beck. Really? Is she testing her future audience for her Fox TV show. You know that’s coming.

One response to “The I Mean…What?!? How-Is-This-News News”

  1. Ericka says:

    You know what's a struggle? Having to write about something you don't think is interesting. I don't know how these 'reporters' do it. Granted, the stuff I have to pitch is an overall positive, because it involves charity, but I find myself wondering if anyone really cares. People want to read about the slander and gossip, not that some celeb is auctioning off dinner with them for charity. Its sad, but a sign of the times.

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