“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

Tyra Banks, move over. We are now watching the ultimate beauty contest between Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann as they go toe to toe in the hopes of becoming America’s Next Top Model… Citizen? Now all we need is a segment with Miss J Alexander as he shows the hopefuls how to walk up to the podium with grace, turn, nod to constituents, wave ever so slightly, then walk off stage without answering any questions. There is little difference between these two ladies when you stop, look and listen to them. Welcome to our newest reality show, model camp meets… Read More »

Leave it up to Sarah Palin, with her grossly misguided sense of self, to launch her comeback from stupidity on Memorial Day Weekend. Kicking off in Washington DC, while grossly using the Vietnam War veterans to pull at heart strings, get ready for a calculated, lame attempt to prove to America, that her One Nation Tour is all about them and not about her. And if you believe that for one second you Tea Party zealot, well, by all means sign up here to buy a piece of what’s left of the Poconos. Sarah Palin and her yahoo family are… Read More »

Move over Marc Jacobs, Brandon Maxwell and Raf Simmons because the KKK debuts its ready-to-wear collection @NYFW. Will Anna Wintour sit front row? The White House has requested front row seats for Melania Trump, while Ivanka Kushner has refused to attend in solidarity with her Jewish husband, Jared, the nebbish.… Read More »

Gross Baboon of the Year Award kicks off awards season here at I Mean What. Hey, look, the Razzies started somewhere and surely not in a ballroom. … Read More »

Not trying to outdo Barbara Walters, but surely after seeing her choices for Ten Most Fascinating People, I have been advised–and well-advised at that–to create my own annual Ten Most Fotz-inating People since Walters’ choices have been so banal… kinda like the people that grace the pages of I Mean What?!? … Read More »

Not that being a dumb ass won’t keep Rick Perry from getting into the White House, but this lovely advertisement that he has running in Iowa to appeal to the craziest people on Earth will surely alienate him once and for all. Operative word… ALIEN. To quote Carrie Fisher from Postcards From The Edge ,”These are the options?” Only I am referring to the Republican homophobes. We have Rick Perry desperately attempting to woo the most conservative wing of the Tea / Republican Party coupled with Michelle and Marcus Bachmann who want to straighten out all the gays (once and… Read More »

Perhaps I do not speak for everyone when mentioning drinking mushroom tea. Have you ever tried it? It is amazing. The reason it has been on my mind lately is because there must be something in the tea of the Tea Party. What exactly are the Tea Party-ers partying on? Surely these people are not stone cold sober. They have to be high on something, and life is not one of them. Reasons below: Michele Bachmann must be on Oxycontin or else she would have known, or had access to know, that the day she was bringing in the sheathes… Read More »

  Politicians are like an “IT” bag, and each season, there is a new “must-have”. This Presidential season is going to be the Chanel of wind bags. You find me one candidate for President of the United States, present company and President included, that is not prone to hypocrisy, and I will pay you money. Seriously, this is a one time offer, as I am not a betting man. No one on Earth can present the case for a candidate who does not talk out of both sides of their mouth and other orifices, in order to please the masses.… Read More »

The tide has turned for Sarah Palin. I recently said, “I don’t care how often Sarah Palin appears on Fox News, nor how disdainfully she speaks of our President while giving kudos to Donald “Orange” Trump for being the Birther-in-Chief, the fact remains that the wind is out of her sail and I couldn’t be happier. Michele Bachmann has stolen her thunder and she must be freaking out.” Boy, what a difference a weekend makes. That One Nation Tour Bus is kicking Michele and every Republican hopeful in the pants. Imagine the ego bloat that those two reality stars, Sarah… Read More »

Where is the outrage? We all know by now how horrendous the Tea Party is with all their racist Tea Bagging shenanigans. But now, things are really spiraling out of control. Where in hell is this Marilyn Davenport, the Orange County Republican Central Committee slash Tea Partyer woman who sent out a mass email depicting Barack Obama as a chimpanzee? What infuriates me is that every news outlet posted the offensive, inappropriate image but no one has posted a picture of the culprit, Marilyn Davenport. We at I Mean..What?!? refused to post that image as we consider ourselves somewhat tactful… Read More »