“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

The news, rather, the not news that Anderson Cooper is gay has sparked a flurry of comments, articles, reactions, presumptions and blather all of which has me wondering what Gay Bizarro World would be like. This is based on a Seinfeld episode based on a Superman episode where everything becomes the polar, or better yet, bi-polar opposite. For instance, in Gay Bizarro World, Kim Kardashian would announce that she is straight, making front page news in the New York Post and an Op-Ed piece by Thomas Friedman in The New York Times. The nationwide reaction would be shock, awe, dismay… Read More »

John Edwards is the Max Bialystock of politics.… Read More »

A fashion faux pas happens every 1.5 seconds in New York City. Leave it up to the uber-fashion victim himself, Kanye “Me Loves Me A Hootchie Mama” West to calls ’em as he sees ’em via Twitter. Seems like Anna West went on a rant about how horeene people dress the other day, and though I may agree with him on some things, one would imagine that he who lives in a glass house might not want to throw stones. More people than not might think that wearing Kim Kardashian as a fashion accessory is questionable… at best. Others would… Read More »

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When someone is this overtly obvious about their life and intentions, it is almost impossible not to pass judgment, just gas. Kim Kardashian does whatever she can on a daily basis to be in the news. Those few weeks when she was relegated to obscurity, she was Jones-ing like a drug addict going cold turkey. She is an addict though. Addicted to herself and that pouty face. Pursed lips drive me bonkers. Poor Kanye West. The president thinks he’s a jack-ass and so do I for obsessing on this thing.… Read More »

Two snaps up to Katy Perry for landing uber-hottie, Baptiste Giabiconi during Paris Fashion Week. Now that is a solid ‘fuck you’ to her ex-nudnik, Russell Brand, a pairing was nauseating from the star. Eswpecially with their two-thousand-day wedding in India minutes after they met. That was kind of a PR scam coupling along the lines of the Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries. Maybe I am being too harsh on Katy. Not to be out-shined, Russell Brand also snagged a model toot suite. Some Canadian slag that ran to chat with Life & Style magazine. “He’s amazing, so funny; he’s… Read More »

With the big news that Rick Santorum does not stand a chance of becoming the Republican nominee in the Race for the White House, much of the other news in the morning papers is more nonsensical than Rick Santorum himself. Sometimes one has to take these bits and pieces of rubbish and share them with his friends. Starting with Miss Piggy, I mean Snooki, pictured above. Word is she is pregnant but in a bind because they just started filming the new reality series Snooki & JWoww, a modern day version of Laverne & Shirley. What could be less interesting… Read More »

What do Snooki and JWoww have in common with Ashley Dupré? Who is Ashely Dupré you ask? How quickly we forget our hookers with a tongue of gold. Ashley was embroiled in the Eliot Spitzer debacle. After that mess, she had a short-lived career as a columnist for the New York Post, naturally, called Ask Ashley, which dealt with everything you wanted to know about being a hooker but were afraid to ask your mother. That lasted long. So after you get booted from the Post, what’s a hooker to do? Open a lingerie shop, of course, and where better… Read More »

Let’s face it, celebrity fragrances are here to stay and the field is getting more competitive as the seconds tick. Kanye West is coming out with one as is Madonna, the world’s greatest marketing expert. Naturally, Lady Gaga can’t miss a day without doing something media savvy, so get ready to smell like Le Hint de Gaga Schtunk. Rumor has it that a Nicki Minaj scent is in the pipeline and betcha my bottom dollar that some Real Housewife is seriously contemplating her options. HSN, here she comes. Hey, if Tovah Borgnine (yes, Ernest Borgnine’s wife) can do it successfully,… Read More »

You cannot believe who is on Baba Wawa’s list for 2011. Fascinating? I call them Fotz-inating. (Etymology of the word Fotz: It started out as a sarcastic reference to something that is or someone that “thinks” they are fascinating. So, it went from, “Oh, you’re fascinating” to “You are fotzinating” to “fotzy balloons” to “fotzy” to the currently, most used…”fotz”.)… Read More »