“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

Our family residence was a low-income nest nestled on a non-tree-lined street amongst a glut of row houses. Think of the East End of London without the cache of, well, London.… Read More »

To what lengths does one have to go in order to achieve fame? It wasn’t until years later that by simply sucking on someone’s cock (Monica Lewinsky and Kim Kardashian) that the distance one had to go to achieve fame was not that far at all. The only distance they had to go…was down.… Read More »

There is no reason to think that Nobel prize-winning author Gabriel García Márquez “Love in the Time of Cholera” and my desperate attempt at writing a book “Last Five Minutes of Fame” should be uttered in the same breath for literary purposes. But then again, Donald Trump shouldn’t be President of the United States, so fuck it…here goes.… Read More »

  LAST FIVE MINUTES OF FAME is a novel novel by Abe Gurko, who stupidly believed Andy Warhol’s edict, “In the future everyone was going to be famous for fifteen minutes.” “It was 1973; I was short, fat, and four-eyed with no immediate hopes of having a life worth living. By no means was I a candidate for becoming a jet setter, and no foreseeable signs of hobnobbing with the lanky Mick Jagger, the groovy Penelope Tree or the beautiful, haunted Marianne Faithfull. Nope. Not from the barely upper middle class upbringing I was experiencing far from that madding crowd. Somehow the… Read More »

Here’s a situation that has me riveted…in a guilty pleasure kind of way…kind of like watching…The Bachelor: On the Wings of Love. Where you really can’t believe that you got whooped up into wasting two hours of your precious time on earth watching this stupid show, yet, totally hoping that anyone but Vienna wins…and horrified when she did. Hence, you lost all respect for Jake. In that same way, I am wondering what Sandra Bullock and Elin Nordegren will do about their cheating husbands? Will they or won’t they forgive them…or will they just leave? Who hasn’t made their minds… Read More »

As we close out the year and begin anew, let’s see who has what it takes to keep their puss in the light of media glare and what nudniks gets cast aside like a pair of old shoes. It’s a tough business, this business of show, and you have to be cunning, baffling and powerful…oh, that’s alcohol, but still applicable here. Who doesn’t benefit from a booze addled night coupled with a few Hooter-types? Can you say Tiger Woods thirteen times fast? Anyhoo, here to kick-off 2010, is the first installment of Last Five Minutes of Fame.… Read More »

Awww. The poor little babies (a.k.a tragic media whores) that think they are all that and a bag of chips by virtue of their being tracked by the tabloid news. You have to love these people for they know not who they are. They only know who they think they are. Then we also have the people who’s media-driven projects that got all sorts of hype but alas, did not live up to the expectations. Cheer up because you have been graced with the honor of being on the I MEAN…WHAT?!? LAST FIVE MINUTES OF FAME LIST. It’s a great… Read More »

Here we have another edition of Last Five Minutes of Fame. This is an odd week because some of the people on this list are the current obsession of the media. Maybe it is wishful thinking. But I am testing my witching powers to see if by virtue of putting them on the list, if that has an impact on what we will see in the press going forward. Which is such a sad state of media affairs. I heard that Access Hollywood told a publicist that they only way they will cover an event if Jon Gosselin attends. Like… Read More »

OMG…IMW…Just when you thought it was safe to come out of the closet, both literally and figuratively, comes yet another fashion week that tops ‘em all. It is called Couture Fashion Week, which happens while New York Fashion Week is under way yet, does not get the attention is deserves. Before I get too bitchy, there is technical mastery in many of these pieces shown by a baker’s dozen of designers. However, the overall presentation feels tranny galore. NEWSFLASH: Johnna Escobedo, who works in my office, was at dinner the other night and couldn’t help overhearing a group of really… Read More »