“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

Fresh from Paris and Milan, we have the Manzie Report featuring the latest trends, mistakes and mishaps for Fall 2011. The over-arching story for men is luxe, sophisticated, elegance. There were boxier shapes and shorter skorts. No, I am not kidding. Since Marc Jacobs wears nothing but kilts, Parisian menswear designers took that look to the next level and hiked up the length of skorts for men. Let’s face it, the kilt length is not all that flattering, and men’s legs are just as lovely to look at as women’s…especially when they are long, lean and muscular.

Collections from Hermes, Giorgio Armani and Lanvin were achingly chic while Miharayasuhiro, Bernhard Wilhelm and Thierry Mugler were campy beyond. The guys from Mugler, who are Lady Gaga‘s stylists, threw looks down the runway that would otherwise be worn by their muse, rather than men. Designer Boris Bidjan Saberi presented a collection that was modeled by Jesus Christ and his Twelve Disciples. I call the look Sexy Peasant. Damir Doma couldn’t resist throwing down a collection geared to obsessive Klaus Nomi fans while Jean Paul Gaultier was compelled to live up to his “bad boy” reputation from twenty years ago by adding some silly looks, which did not enhance his otherwise dapper collection. What is apparent is that the “Dandy” in not happening and men are men again. Coca-Cola must be sponsoring Dolce & Gabbana in light of their tax evasion drama while Muccia Prada was seemingly inspired by Justin Timberlake and Andy Samberg‘s song, Dick In A Box. Anna Wintour will be safe this season because PETA will have their hands full throwing paint balls at men since so many collections featured fur bits on collars.

I could go on and on…but you get the drift.