“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

The tide has turned for Sarah Palin. I recently said, “I don’t care how often Sarah Palin appears on Fox News, nor how disdainfully she speaks of our President while giving kudos to Donald “Orange” Trump for being the Birther-in-Chief, the fact remains that the wind is out of her sail and I couldn’t be happier. Michele Bachmann has stolen her thunder and she must be freaking out.” Boy, what a difference a weekend makes. That One Nation Tour Bus is kicking Michele and every Republican hopeful in the pants. Imagine the ego bloat that those two reality stars, Sarah… Read More »

Oy vey. There is a reality show for everyone and a jewlery or fashion line, as well. That said, I came across these lovely baubles that will launch on HSN, that fashion channel for mavens, that I wanted to share them with you. I have one word for this: Help! These treasures are from the new Gastineau Glamour collection from those perky reality show stars Brittny and her mamma bear Lisa Gastineau. The good news? Bethenny Frankel and Jill Zarin have a long prosperous future. Wait, did I say good news? Shoot me. Clearly, every Housewife ever will end up… Read More »

And the gloves are off. Who will win the ratings battle between The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills versus The Real Housewives of New York City this season? Duh. Beverly Hills of course. I have never been a big fan or watcher of the New York housewives because–well–who cares about these run of the mill ladies who lunch? Or in the case of Bethenny Frankel, liquid lunch. The Beverly Hills broads live an aspirational, opulent lifestyle whereas the New York ladies are a bunch of yentas, living seemingly above their means or worse–Brooklyn. Needless to say the Beverly Hills broads… Read More »

Congratulations California…you can now do it. And when I say it, I mean take that leap of faith that straights have been doing for centuries by getting married….like Bethenny Frankel. To be clear though, with marriage comes divorce. Here is a happy statistic: 50% of all marriages will end up in divorce. Before gays go running off in droves to become bridezillas, please think long and hard before you become like straight people, getting divorced at the first signs of a bad sex life, whining and complaining. Look, I am not opposed to gay marriage. Live and let live. The… Read More »

We knew that Rachel Uchitel would not fade into the woodwork forever after taking the alleged millions of dollars from Tiger Woods in exchange for shutting her uber-collagen enhanced lips about their illicit sexual affair. The good news is, who needed her to tell us anything, my sources told me plenty. In particular, Tiger would demand sex AT LEAST three or four times a day, that she would have to drop what she was doing and run to his side…no questions asked. Clearly, the slogan “Tiger in his tank” has new meaning. Woodsy also preferred a different orifice each time,… Read More »

Freaky looking Bethenny Frankel lost all her baby weight in like two minutes. The Skinny Margarita spokesperson has to be skinny. Vomit much? – PAGE SIX httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fnn0oq-H4pc Lindsay Lohan requested that the last video featured on IMW-TV be taken down yesterday, but this new one get’s her seal of approval. Whatever. PAGE SIX reports that “Kara Dioguardi is as nice as can be”. Tell me something I don’t know. These two Real Housewives of New York City attend perhaps THE saddest Up Fronts on Earth. See… What… I… Mean?!?… Read More »

Page Six reports about the proposed competition for The View from CBS-TV, you know, that network for old people, starring the lamest choices this side of the falling ashes of Iceland. Get this: Lisa Rinna – She can always lead the plastic surgery topics. Julie Chen – Nepotism…much? Bethenny Frankel – Yikes…like we need to see her on yet another network? Sara Gilbert – Yes, she was dry and funny on Roseanne, but that was 2,000 years ago. Where do I begin? First of all, all four of those don’t add up to one of Joy Behar’s shoes. And while… Read More »

It seems like the tide is beginning to slowly turn on these so called celebrities, a.k.a reality television stars. Case in point, my  prediction yesterday of the reason why the Jersey Shore cast is heading back to…well…the Jersey shore. Seems like they were turned away from most places in Miami, which I could have told MTV, had they asked. Come on, what brand besides Ed Hardy want to be affiliated with those kids? Sure, when they were the flavor of the month, they were all the rage. Even Harper’s Bazaar was all over them. Now that the Jersey dust has… Read More »

As we wind down from a financially awkward year and look back at “What the F#@k Was That?!?”, let’s take a moment to consider what things we would like to see go away in 2010. Today’s article in Women’s Wear Daily on Novelty Fading for Pop-Up Shops suggests that they are losing steam, but retail events will be more necessary than ever, think Fashion’s Night Out. Pop-Up shops are not going anywhere since there are so many great reasons for them to continue thriving, considering all the empty retail spaces, not to mention the built-in marketing opportunities for the participating… Read More »

Not too long ago I did a piece on these so called parties, featuring people(?) snapped by photographers that were beyond yikes. When I say beyond yikes, I mean, who are they and why are they being photographed? Well, having had a great response from the I Mean…What?!? audience, here with, another segment of The Party’s Over. When I started my career as a party goer, it was the first few days of Studio 54. Back then, the paparazzi were focused on real celebrities and interesting notables. Boy have things changed. There’s little else to say except please enjoy this… Read More »