Hostess Twinkies: The Gayest Brand On Earth

Nov 18, 2012Breaking Newzzz

Looks like Twinkie the Kid is a stripper too.

Twinkie-Gate. It really would be a shame if Hostess Twinkies goes under after eighty years of bringing toxic plazmosa to American children and fatsos of all ages. As I looked back at the rich history of this iconic brand one could not help noticing how gay the brand is when you look at their product assortment. Look, I trust my gaydar and I have three words for you, Twinkie The Kid. A mascot as nelly as you get, his faux cowboy duds didn’t fool me, in fact, it made Twinkie the Kid even gayer once the Village People became mainstream. Suddenly cowboys and Indians were less about guns and fighting and more about tops and bottoms. Twinkie being…

Twinkies is an endearing term for young queens which began somewhere in 1979.

(WIKIPEDIA)  “Twinkie defense” is a derisive label for an improbable legal defense. It is not a recognized legal defense in jurisprudence, but a catchall term coined by reporters during their coverage of the trial of defendant Dan White for the murders of San Francisco city supervisor Harvey Milk and mayor George Moscone. White’s defense was that he suffered diminished capacity as a result of his depression. His change in diet from healthy food to Twinkies and other sugary food was said to be a symptom of depression. Contrary to common belief, White’s attorneys did not argue that the Twinkies were the cause of White’s actions, but that their consumption was symptomatic of his underlying depression. White was convicted of voluntary manslaughter.

That aside, look at these commercial from the early 70’s on for the various Hostess products. Twinkies, Ho-Hos, Fruit Pies and Doing Dongs? Come on.

Gay as geese.


Twinkie The Kid is Nude…And Hanging Out In Kiddie Playground. Yikes.

King Ding Dong? With Cream Filling? Please.

Happy Ho Ho? That’s What We’re All Called At One Point.

Fruit Pie The Magician? Come Here And Get Your Fruit Pie Little Girl/Boy. I Can’t!


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