Hail to the Chief. Or is it Hile?
Come 2012, if Sarah Palin has her druthers, the White House will once again be just that, white. But not just white, we’re talkin’ really, really white. Alaska snow white. Pre-Lyndon B. Johnson Civil Rights Movement white. Her first day in office she will make some cockadoodle proclamation, “We need a woman in the White House to clean up the mess of that last administration.” Can’t you just hear it now? The irony will be that a white woman is cleaning up after black people. I wonder if she will do windows.
The new First Family will be very innovative. Todd Palin will be the first house husband. He will be relegated to hosting other dignitary’s wives, decor and the trimming of the White House Christmas tree. Can’t you just see the moose-head over the first fireplace? The rabbit’s foot Christmas tree ornaments? Any money bet that Todd will do away with silly vegetable patch that Michelle created with Alice Waters. Instead, he will transform it into a duck hunting patch. There, he and the new President take resume their healthy, outdoor lifestyle whenever President Palin needs to clear her mind from turning back the hands of time to when we were racist Puritans. In addition to the traditional Easter Egg Hunt, the First Family will enjoy a series of new family-centric events such as The Annual Summer Fag Bashing, The Backyard Bad Dancing Contests, and the Candie’s sponsored Out-of-Wedlock Safe Sex Parties that the press will never expose for fear of being castrated by the President…literally.
