“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

Here’s proof that all you need is some dough in order to get a star of the Hollywood Walk of Fame. What’s next? Grauman’s Chinese Theater letting Kim Kardashian plant her tootsies in their precious cement? Call me old fashioned, but when I think of the Hollywood Walk of Fame, I think of Greta Garbo, Jean Harlow, Clark Gable and Fred Astaire…to name a few. Not Howie Mandel, or P Diddy, or does it say Sean Combs…whatever, Buzz Aldrin (really? why, cause he lives in LA?), or Ryan Seacrest. Can we call that a stretch…please? It all proves my point… Read More »

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XKr1wqK5h_k Directed by David McIntyre for Image Loading — http://imageloading.com… Read More »

I am a huge Rachel Zoe fan. As a ex-fatty I cannot condemn her for wanting to be too rich or too thin, which is the mantra of the glitterati set. Seems like she is really busy and always on the run, extremely neurotic, and uber-self conscious. All of those things make you loose weight, so she in fact can start The Rachel Zoe Diet, which is the combination of all of the aforementioned. The Rachel Zoe Diet limits your food intake, quadruples you Starbucks ingestion and the act of saying and being fiercely fabulous will take pounds off your… Read More »

Yesterday, I mentioned that Karl Lagerfeld thinks that only thin people can pull off the Underwear as Outerwear Look that has seized every collection. I received a note from one of my lovely I Mean…What?!? readers. She goes by the name Marketing, and she referred to an old story I did, Underwear is the New Outerwear.  Marketing agrees with Karl Lagerfeld and also says, “Many stylish women are wearing more corsets, matched with skirts or pants. Sometimes they even wear one over a simple blouse.” Really? Naturally I was intrigued. My new, dear best friend, Marketing was kind enough to… Read More »

Recently, January Jones was photographed in GQ flaunting her tits a la Maxim. As the magazine industry continues to spiral downward, GQ, whose readers I guess want to see boobs, has been featuring actresses with that come hither approach to photography a.k.a. Playboy. Maxim is the NASCAR version of Playboy, and the more attention the women get who grace the pages, the more little Hollywood starlets want to be featured there. Case in point, child actress Amanda Bynes, who took this Maxim moment to break out from her goody-two-shoes perception and show the world her parts. I call this Maxim… Read More »

V is For Victory for Voluminously, Voluptuous Women. To be clear, V Magazine is doing a whole issue with plus-sized models. This is a major statement for the normally anorexic audience that reads most uber-fabulous glossies. Didn’t they all start the trend in vomiting and other such lovely feats of strength to look thin and gorgeous. As a past fatty, I am glad that V is willing to dedicate this much attention and resources to acknowledge this audience. I just wonder if it will be the token fat issue and never again will we see an a bulge…except in V… Read More »

Let’s go back in time a few months when NBC announced its “ground breaking” late-night turned prime-time programming coup d’ etat. The hype was exhausting. Leno was a bigger news story than both wars put together. Jeff Zucker touted, “The Jay Leno Show will change the face of prime-time television”. The peacock network was basking in the glow of their brilliant maneuver way before the first show aired. Jay Leno even said, “If we go down in flames, we’ll be laughing on the way down, believe me,” during the summer press tour. Do you think Jay Leno and Jeff Zucker… Read More »

For weeks, I have been begging the media to let dead Tigers lay…as in the case of Tiger Woods and his many whores. But as time marches on, we are still accosted by claims from these cheap hussies, case in point and the winner of Gross Baboon of the Year, Loredana Jolie…no relation to Angelina…who must be plotzing as far as possible Google affiliations go. Seriously though, I am so not interested in Tiger Wood’s penis and now I need to know even more about it? And this hooker Loredana needs to try her hand at writing a book?!? What… Read More »

I have been posting the Last Five Minutes of Fame for several months and Tila Tequila never made it because prior to my starting I Mean…What?!? in February ’09, Tila’s 15 minutes had pretty much been up. Well, the saddest reason has brought Tila back into the limelight and someone needs to keep her down. Lord knows this is her potential comeback. Maybe she and Loredana can collaborate on a book or better yet, a trashy reality show with hookers and bisexuals and needy bitches. What could we call it…hmmmmm…The Real Low Lives of Las Vegas. Oh Bravo…where are you?… Read More »

How dare Weatherproof stand by their choice to use the image of Barack Obama in their massive billboard advertising campaign in Times Square. Just because Barack is the only person that would wear that old man crap. Oh, come now, Barack is no style maven. Haven’t you seen the jeans Obama wears? Yikes. They are like mom jeans for dads. I call them Obama Mama Jeans. But that’s not the point I am trying to make here. The fact remains that Barack Obama is our president and should not be used in vain. No matter how vain any president is…and… Read More »