“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

Lindsay Lohan may have been paid $1.5 million for that Ungaro mess…and trashed a room at The Bowery Hotel along the way. – THE CUT Madge is back in Malawi! -Yahoo! News How insane can you be? Ivanka Trump’s stalker thinks he still has a chance with her…yikes. -Popeater Jason Lee’s ex-wife reveals some dish about Scientology…and has an amazing story about crazy Jenna Elfman. -Radar Look out skanks…he’s back and loking for love. -PAGE SIX… Read More »

Look, even hats get to be famous these days. This floppy, ribbon hat is flying off the shelves after Sandra Bullock was snapped wearing it. – E.T. Skanks Incorporated is about to have their first Board meeting. Michelle McGee, Hailey Glassman and Gina Lynn will be together doing some skanky nonsense. – PAGE 6 The Church is comparing the Pope’s situation to the persecution of the Jews during WWII. Shown here, Marlene Lugosi Pope Benedict (Arnold) loves this hat because it covers her his ears. – NY TIMES Though she was 2 1/2 hours late for her recent concert in… Read More »

Am I that old where I can no longer appreciate teenyboppers? Am I that cranky and jaded that there’s no summoning up the adulation for a Twinkie that sings? Am I alone here? When I was young, yes, 4,000 years ago, we also had heartthrobs that swept the nation. We might have started that phenomenon actually. Well, Elvis did and that was before my time. But Elvis changed music as did The Beatles. They changed everything beyond music, too, like personal style and while they were at it, the entire culture. One can surely understand screaming for them. But I… Read More »

(Click on image for full story) You gotta love Chelsea Handler for saying what I have been saying forever about wanting Kate Gosselin’s Fifteen Minutes of Fame to end. – NY Daily News The iPad obsession is boring. I will definitely get one…when they get over themselves. It’s not a cancer treatment…its landfill. Relax. At least David Letterman get’s the joke. Russian Fashion Week features the pride of Borat. Say hello to the cast of “Jerseylicious.” New Jersey is about to have a hey dey…as in “Hey, you tsawkin’ tsoo me?” Oy, Lindsay, get your roots done. Are you on… Read More »

There’s nothing like a rainy Saturday afternoon, curled up on the couch with the new issue of Vanity Fair. It has been a favorite pastime for years…especially since we get so much freakin’ rain. Lately though, some of the subjects and stories featured in VF are getting as pedestrian as punch. Case in point: the issue with the Tiger Woods‘ cover, thrown in there for good measure, to garner some newsstand action. I understand that need for Graydon Carter to want get in on the greatest media obsession on Earth, but that cover was nauseating and frankly, above Vanity Fair.… Read More »

Oh Madonna, Madonna, Madonna. Madge, Madge, Madge. You are making me all fatootzed (confused in Yiddish). I am soooo not feeling the Material Girl–brought to you by Macy’s–thing at all. I know, through Kabbalah, you are like officially Jewish now. But that does not mean you have to automatically go into the schmatta business. And does Lourdes need to have a career at thirteen years of age? What’s wrong with a Bat-Mitzvah at Leonard’s of Great Neck and some dance classes? I know, you are a great mother. But I am not so sure that you are a real Jewish… Read More »

By any chance, are you one of the 72 people that watches High Society? Isn’t it shocking how annoying Jules Kirby, Paul (wishes he was an heir to) Johnson Calderon and PrinceSS Adolf von Schtunkenberry are? And yo, Tinsley Mortimer, what’s the deal with all these phony situations? Doesn’t the CW11 realize this is as queer as a three dollar bill? That fake drama around the fake charity event could not have been more lame. It was like a fundraiser for Tinsley’s Q rating. Why am I watching this crap, you ask? So that I can report to you, my… Read More »

Let’s face it kids, when I ask: ABE: Who wears a matching red hat with red Prada shoes and elaborate dresses? YOU: Dame Edna? ABE: No. YOU: Any of the contestants on RuPaul’s Drag Race? ABE: No. Give up? Here’s a hint. He turns a blind eye to child molesters and is the top dog of the Catholic church. YOU: Justin Bieber? ABE: No, you maroon. It’s the Pope, the Holy Pontiff, His Grace in the Glass Menagerie. Nice reputation, Marlene Pope Benedict XVI. I mean…really…would you let this guy, if he was not the Pope, anywhere near your kids?… Read More »

If you haven’t seen images from the recent volcano in Iceland, check this out. My freind Steinunn and I were chatting on SKYPE and she showed this website and please click on this image to see more of the volcanic fierceness.… Read More »

TMZ is reporting a sort of Chicken Little prophecy regarding the future of Lindsay Lohan. Her friends are very concerned that Linday’s partying is spiraling out of control and fear for her life. Well, whatever the case, I do hope that is not the case. Then again…who wouldn’t fall flat on their face in those ridiculous heels? Girl…Tory Burch flats for you.… Read More »