“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

With the passing of Elizabeth Taylor, there is a hole in the celebrity fragrance market that Justin Bieber can fill with the launch of his new product line, Justin Bieber Scented Dog Tags. Move over Jennifer Aniston with your Lolavie nonsense because The Biebs is here with a fresh take on how to smell. The celebrity fragrance and celebrity designer industry is alive and kicking and Justin’s dog tags are the best of both worlds. It is a fragrance that will spice up your wardrobe, while spicing up the way you smell. It is borderline brilliant in a kitsch kind… Read More »

Sammi ‘Sweetheart’ Giancola is launching a capsule collection of jewelry on the heels of her signature fragrance, Dangerous. The Jersey Shore cast has marketed themselves to death, case in point, Snooki, who has 50 licensees of products ranging from bunny slippers to pocketbooks. I call Snooki the Pierre Cardin of New Jersey. Anyhoo, the limited edition collection of Sammi Sweetheart crap is priced from $15 to $45.… Read More »

Clearly I am not a Jennifer Aniston fan. Not since last century when Friends was one of my favorite shows and I pined for “The Rachel” hairdo. I still do, but that is because I have no hair so I’ll take anything. No, after observing Jennifer in certain situations (lush) when I lived in Los Angeles, it took the wind of out the sail of loving Jennifer Aniston. Besides, the show was canceled by then and she changed up her hair. When she married Brad Pitt, I wondered if this was a Hollywood gay cover-up because they had the same… Read More »

Last season I reviewed Jersey Shore and somehow this season’s review is eerily similar. Could it be because nothing has really changed besides their location? The Return to the Jersey Shore is actually a better title for season three. Do we even call them seasons? They are more like outings. Perhaps even a series of mini-series. Jersey Shore is like Roots without the class. In Thursday night’s season opener, we met an even tackier version of Snooki, her friend Deena. What can I say besides Jersey Shore is chock-full of cursing chubby people. OK, so The Situation has good abs,… Read More »

Clearly that well documented photo shoot between Justin Bieber and Kim Kardashian for Elle magazine had a lasting impression on the impressionable Justin Bieber. His camp has announced the creation of Eau De Toilette Justin Bieber. Toilette being the operative word. Well, if you think about it, a fragrance for lesbians marketed to tweens is borderline genius. Anyone who is anyone knows about my ongoing issue with celebrity fragrances and why it irks me to no end. The fact remains that the egos of these entertainers has gotten so out of control, that it cheapens their act altogether. Not that… Read More »

How many times have I said, “Now I have heard everything”. Whether it was from the lips of a socialite on that silly show High Society or when Governor David Patterson was rumored to have spent taxpayer dollars on blow and hookers, to name a couple of for instances. Today’s bit of news takes the cake. Kate Walsh, that C-list actress from Private Practice, perhaps you remember her from Grey’s Anatomy as Dr. McSteamy’s love interest, since no one watches that spin-off, has launched her own fragrance. No, I am not kidding. As though Katy Perry’s Purr wasn’t annoying enough,… Read More »

Have you considered how much money, time, thought, conversation, discussion, testing…not to mention the amount of focus groups, arguing, and overspending that goes into the development and marketing of a celebrity fragrance? One could compare the energy and cost of a single celebrity fragrance to…well…let’s see…the war in Iraq? Years and years of tireless effort…for what? What I wouldn’t do to be a fly on the wall for any one of these projects from its inception to the official launch event. I Mean…What!? has done piece after piece on celebrity fragrances and now that Katy Perry’s Purr is out there,… Read More »

The papers are trashing Jennifer Aniston for her newest bomb The Switch, which you could have seen coming a mile away by the premise alone. Who walks around with the sperm intended for the hoo-ha. Your biological time clock is ticking…what’s with the celebration before the fact? Hurry up girl…shove it in. Here’s how the casting of this role went down. INT. CAA OFFICES – DAY CAA AGENT: Here, Jen, do this movie, it’s called The Switch. JENNIFER: Who is the director? CAA AGENT: (Thinking to himself) Who does she think she is…Bette Davis? JENNIFER: Is it yet another comedy?… Read More »

Nothing is garnering more media attention than Fashion’s Night Out. Not the Oscars, the MTV Music Awards, New York Fashion Week, Snooki. Nothing.  When we look at what drove Anna Wintour to devise one of the greatest marketing plans on Earth, we see at the core, a beautiful, well-intended, generous, spirited gem of an idea. “Bring people back to the stores.” Funny, that when George Bush said the same thing after 9-11, that people should just “Go Shopping”, it was met with mixed emotions. Actually, Democrats were apoplectic. But if you think about it…it was a good idea. When is… Read More »

Thou Shalt Not Take The Name Of Elizabeth Taylor In Vain When Moses came down from Mount Sinai with the Fifteen Commandments, as depicted in Mel Brooks‘ History of the World Part 1, there were five commandments that never saw the light of day. (Watch this short clip to learn about this little known biblical fact in Exodus 20:2–17.) httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x5aO7sswvJo Anyhoo, one of those laws as commanded by the Lord himself was: Thou shalt not take the name of Elizabeth Taylor in vain. Sadly, we have become a society not dissimilar to those Israelite hedonists running rampant in the desert,… Read More »