“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

All this talk about the Fiscal Cliff reminds me of Road Runner and Wile E. Coyote. … Read More »

When innocent, good-hearted, well-intentioned, loving people die…way too young…it gives me pause to come back from days of grief to the real world and read a newspaper. There I am accosted by people that should be ashamed of themselves for opening their pie holes and spewing or Tweeting the kind of nonsense that should otherwise have them carving their draggy asses into hell rather than having a prime spot on the media landscape. Must I name names or will that make me equally as evil? Fine. John Sununu. How much longer must we listen to this jerk for? Hasn’t he… Read More »

This political season, the media is making mountains out of molehills. Case in point, the supposed momentum of Rick “I HATE SEX” Santorum. Momentum schmomentum… and I use the term schmo-mentum literally here. This guy is such a dufus, that he actually thinks he has a chance. All of a sudden he has that Orange Republican Glow (ORG) about him as shown above. Clearly when a Republican is having a good day, they run to get a spray tan and there is no one in their camp to tell them that they look ridiculous. Cases in point: see below. So,… Read More »

Though there were a slew of fabulous dresses at Cannes this season, I hereby take credit for the fact that not one single star at Cannes wore a one shoulder dress in response to my commentary and coverage of the Costume Institute Gala. Well, correction. There were a couple of them but not worn by stars, so they don’t count—times two. Honestly, who cares about some ubiquitous Israeli socialite, or Miss Universe, for that matter. They both look like they are off to a Bar Mitzvah at Leonard’s of Great Neck. (You know I love that reference.) After what clearly… Read More »

For those of you who have been reading I Mean…What?!? for a while, you might recall in my many Manzie Reports from last year and my observation that Gina Lollobrigida Orange was the new black. Naturally, I was being facetious because the way they were showing orange on the men’s runways in Milan and Paris, you would have to be insane to be caught dead walking the streets in half of these get ups, rather, you would get the shit kicked out of you by a pack of homophobes. Fortunately, orange in regards to menswear, never really took off, but… Read More »

Awww. The poor little babies (a.k.a tragic media whores) that think they are all that and a bag of chips by virtue of their being tracked by the tabloid news. You have to love these people for they know not who they are. They only know who they think they are. Then we also have the people who’s media-driven projects that got all sorts of hype but alas, did not live up to the expectations. Cheer up because you have been graced with the honor of being on the I MEAN…WHAT?!? LAST FIVE MINUTES OF FAME LIST. It’s a great… Read More »

Hair is probably the most complicated issue of our time. Perhaps second to universal health care…but an issue of the highest, most unprecedented order. Oh, yeah, and world peace. On second thought, hair is the number one issue for mankind and the other things follow suit. How can I say that? Well, admit it. You spend more time thinking about your hair as opposed to Obama’s heath care plan or the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq combined. Therefore…hair wins…horrendous as that sounds. These days with regards to hairstyles…everything goes. But, someone needs to be the voice of reason to prove… Read More »