“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

Ahhh, the journey of one person’s struggle to become a celebrity. How many of these situations have we watched unfold in front of our eyes. Lost count? I sure have. But I’d like to stop and discuss a few of these people who have hit the airwaves with a thunderous boom and share my perspective. Today’s article in The New York Times Style section about Jesus Luz, Madonna’s boyfriend, is a searing, riveting tale of how one poor, little boy in Brazil made his way to the top of the New York City heap, complete with publicist. Grab your hankies.… Read More »

Last month I did a piece called the Nobody News, which is about a bunch of nobodies…that seem to be somebody…to a bunch of nobodies. If you do not know what I just said, it pretty much sums up our current media fascination with plucked-out-of-obscurity “notables”. That and a couple of “celebrities” thrown into the mix, a.k.a. people I couldn’t care less about. However, do I stand alone? Looking at today’s news reports, it was clear that the Nobody News was aching for a comeback. With that, I give you this.… Read More »

Each summer, flocks of people migrate east to The Hamptons. Like birds, they set up nests, arrange their beach wardrobes and busy themselves with all sorts of relaxing activities. Here is a typical day in the life of a Hamptonite: sit in traffic walk around ad nauseam have cocktails or dinner at whatever has been suggested by the media shop for things that otherwise would not be purchased share bedrooms with total strangers…as a living situation, not a sexual encounter congregate with people they otherwise despise desperately try to meet a mate pretend to be nice to potential mates stand… Read More »

George Bernard Shaw wrote, “Youth Is Wasted On The Young”. And after watching the first couple of episodes of NYC Prep, that expression still holds true…and in the case of these pompous noodniks…in spades. There is a column in the The New York Times Style section about the show, which fails to mention just how incredibly horrendous these kids are. The stark reality of these NYC Prepsters, as is the case with the characters on Gossip Girl, is that they all want to rush through their youth and act like grown-ups. I am from the Peter Pan era where the… Read More »

Words cannot describe how annoyed I am that Perez Hilton released those photos of Dustin Lance Black in the full monty and every other position on Earth. As it is, I have drastically reduced my Perez viewing over the past several months. Had I not gone to Gawker, I would have missed this entry. But, I didn’t and I am fuming. That a gay man in the position of such power (Perez) would not do his damn best to protect an important gay talent is unconscionable. And why the hell didn’t Dustin’s publicist put the kabosh on those images? Someone… Read More »

Policy shmolicy. Who wants to join a group that doesn’t let you be who you are and cultivate the best in you? Gays want to be in the military? For what? The clothes? I am confused. Are you trying to tell me that grunting along some dusty patch of Middle Eastern soil is what you really want to go for? What about shopping on Madison? Or happy hours in Chelsea (NYC). The term “gay” kicked in the 1960’s and since then, the reference to homosexuality has shifted to a light, frothy, sexy lifestyle filled with booze, drugs and dancing. No?… Read More »

Far be it from me to let this David Carradine story go by without commenting on it. Naturally, I wish the Carradine family much peace at this horrible time. But he died of what? How? Where? What? Huh? As a product of the swinging 70’s, my sexual proclivities were quite risque, as were most people’s then, thanks to Quaaludes. If you never did one, it is hard to describe. You took a Lude and ended up in someone else’s bed. Period. My friend Nancy was known to say, “That tree is beginning to look sexy” and off she’d go to… Read More »

From here on, Eminem is officially, M&M. The Sunday night, completely inappropriate, ass-in-face stunt turns out to have been planned and rehearsed. I guess M&M likes that position after all…the position of being mocked and made to look like a fool. So many people thought that the whole situation was unfortunate. In hind sight (literally), it is an abomination that this kind of immaturity rules and is the bane of MTV’s existence. Wanna bet the Bruno movie will feature a song by M&M? There is always some sort of cross-promotional deal in the air with MTV. They are the masters… Read More »

UPDATE: DECEMBER 21, 2009 Brooke Astor’s son, Anthony Marshall has been sentenced one to three years in state penitentiary. This is the mandatory jail time carried with the charge of grand larceny in the first degree. The 85 year old Marshall will also receive one year for each of the other charges for which he was found guilty, to be served concurrently. THIS WAS THE ORIGINAL STORY This ongoing salacious, sordid story about Brooke Astor, her namby-pamby eighty year-old son, (85 year-old and son in the same sentence sounds weird) Anthony Marshall and his cow (or pig) of a wife… Read More »

Aww, poor babies. Did it hurt when the SEC yanked the silver spoon out of your ass? Andrew, Mark (and Mommy Dearest, Ruth) are trying to act like innocent bystanders, victims of their own circumstance. I ain’t buyin’ it. These boys are like the thousands, if not millions of spoiled rich kids, who on their own merit could not make a hill of beans out of themselves and resort to working for Daddy, Daddy, Daddy. And then, when that doesn’t pay enough for what they think they are entitled to, they run to Mommy, Mommy, Mommy for chunks of dough… Read More »