“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

There are certain people that are permeating the airwaves that make me say more than I MEAN…WHAT?!? They are a combination of all-wrong, void of social consciousness, and truly annoying. I pray for them to fade into the sunset (’cause I am so spiritual), but that doesn’t seem to help. Someone needs to put them out of their media-blaring misery. So, I’ve started the I MEAN…WHAT?!? Hit List. No, I do not wish them death…rather…complete and everlasting obscurity. Ohmmmmm.… Read More »

Being a man of many opinions, and having commented extensively on the horrendositude of what Madonna and Leighton Meester wore to the Costume Institute Gala, I’ve decided to elaborate on that train of thought and create my own worst dressed list. Having worked within the confines of the industry for years, it never ceases to amaze me how The Emperor’s New Clothes fable is alive and well and entrenched in the fashion industry. My seasonal “I MEAN WHAT?!? Was She Wearing List”, will highlight the women (and men) that made me say, “Don’t they own a mirror?” or “Don’t they have any real… Read More »

Call me crazy…you wouldn’t be the first…but the members of the “Axis of Evil” are yay interested in Obama and his minions. Kim Jong-Il and Mahmoud Ahmadinejad don’t give a hoot about this new administration and are hell bent on acting like peacocks and showing off their lovely feathers. That or, “My dick’s bigger than yours, Barak Obama”, is the message here with all these nuclear threats and tests. (Clearly the bigger dick thing is not the case with Kim Jong-Il, but I digress.) So, what are we supposed to do with these mother fuckers? Can’t we just take them out?… Read More »

When did these tacky gifting suites enter the realm of fabulous? Who were/are these people that infiltrated the groovy backstage green rooms in order to display their sad wares? And when did real celebrities begin to frolic through free shit not minding that it becomes a press opportunity? When did fabulous go all wrong? Somewhere between the Golden Age of Hollywood and now, things have gotten cock-eyed. Press is no longer real press, and celebrities are no longer real celebrities, rather a bunch of schnorrers (Yiddish for moocher, as in Minnie the). Any schnook (Yiddish for stupid person) can be… Read More »

I’m an avid New York Times reader. The Grey Lady has been etched in my mind as the “go to” publication (now website) for vital information, news of the day, critical opinions, the barometer of the zeitgeist. However, the Style section is so out of touch and not interesting, that it boggles the mind. Today’s lead story declares this is the “Age of Nice”. First of all, how is that style? The article points out the lamest reasons too:… Read More »

Well, shut my mouth. And that is hard to do. Kara DioGuardi blasted me and America away with her unexpectedly fantastic rendition of Vision of Love / pissing contest with that wanna-be Miss USA, “bikini girl’ Katrina Darrell. By the way, Kara won hands down not only for singing, but the body-ody-ody. Until that moment, I was reserving judgment on Kara, the newest member of the Idol judges. And I was really not feeling that finale song that she co-wrote, especially not for Adam, if he had won, which he didn’t…but he did, ’cause winning that title is the kiss… Read More »

Recently I pointedly pointed out how silly looking The Quirky Man-Hat was and that guys who wore these too-small-for-their-head hats, looked like Man-zies. The newest addition to the “Must Not Do” list for men is wearing designer shorts. Unless of course, you don’t mind looking like a big ol’ Man-zie. The New York Times’ recent, lame-ass editorial spread on men’s looks for spring…a.k.a. MAN-SIES GALORE was all sorts of wrong. The Style section is an abomination: so after the fashion fact and past the curve of relevant. Oh and by the way, Cathy Horn needs to leave The New York… Read More »

Not winning American Idol was the best thing that could have happened to Adam Lambert. When the little foof Kris Allen won and had to start singing that incredibly horrible song by Kara (fierce abs) DioGuardi, the future was clear for Adam. Kris has to make all the traditional AI moves and Adam is going to saunter into a recording studio and do what he wants as an artist. The AI texting public is not who will ultimately make Adam a star. It’s his vision and extreme talent that will find him a massive worldwide, loyal following. Why? Rock-n-Roll Rules.… Read More »

I have avoided commenting on American Idol but couldn’t resist after last nights hullabaloo? What in tarnation was that horeene Kara DioGuardi song? She’s a judge because why? Couldn’t you just see Simon barfing at that song? I sure wish he would have been his usual twitty self with her as he’s been with every contestant since the show began. “Kara, that was self-indulgent nonsense.” With the extensive world-wide attention that this season has garnered due to the Gay vs. Christian debate, I doubt if I could add anything to what has already being said by millions of obsessed fans.… Read More »

Although I am on a quasi-vacation, this ditty caught my eye so I wanted to share the horrendosity of it all. Posh Spice’s handbag collection is worth $2,000,000. Like I care to know this? This is news? That she needs 100 Birkin bags speaks to a much larger story of neediness and self-absorption. How Beckham deals with this is a bit of a mystery to me. Seems like Guy Richie had enough of the Madonna overkill and set himself free. But, hey, who am I to judge what goes on behind closed doors. If I were the Beckhams, I’d much… Read More »