“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

What happened to the women’s movement? In the aftermath of the recent Rush Limbaugh Slut-gate, coupled with the queasy-stomach inducing Rick Santorum rhetoric about contraception, I am harkened back to the Salem Witch Trials. How can you allow Gross Baboons like Sanotrum and Limbaugh make hay? Surely you learned about those days, before Gloria Steinem made it OK for women to have an opinion and Helen Gurley Brown cleared the path to having an orgasm. It was before Erica Jong’s Fear of Flying, which was around the time when burning the bra replaced shopping for them. Wasn’t this incredible time… Read More »

In the Golden Days of Hollywood, no one cared about much besides the stars of stage and screen. Tallulah Bankhead, Bette Davis, Katherine Hepburn, Clark Cable, the list goes on. Seems like we have graduated (or what’s the opposite of that?) to be far more concerned with the whereabouts and goings on of the lowest of lowbrows of our society. The Nobody Newzzz is back and we have plenty to crow about. Crow as in old crow because the top story this week is about the Salahis. You will remember Michaele and Tartiq Salahi, that couple of Gross Baboons who… Read More »

UPDATE TO THAT UPDATE: Merv Griffin Productions has commit to Courtney Stodden to produce her reality show, Skank and Grampa (working title). The realness is getting realer than real, but really? Who is going to watch this nonsense? They have not locked in a network yet. Have they tried the Playboy Channel? Other classic television shows on Playboy TV are Brooklyn Kinda Love and The Stash. UPDATE TO THE UPDATE: Guess who is getting a reality show? Umm….give up? You got that right. The May-September romance of these two self-involved looney tunes will birth a new reality series following these… Read More »

Talk about showing up late to the party. There is a group of anti-gay zealots that want to overturn the Marriage Equality Act that went into law this week for the State of New York. What is with these right-wing religious hypocrites? As we see in these pictures, there is an equal smattering of Gross Baboons and Orthodox Jews, you know, of the recent killing of the little boy fame. As well as the many Orthodox Jewish men who I witnessed coming regularly to the Meatpacking District in the 1990’s when I lived there to pick up MALE tranny hookers.… Read More »

Now that Anthony Weiner has resigned and will soon vanish from the headlines, as the paparazzi and all the haters melt into the sunset leaving him and Huma alone to redefine their relationship, should Weiner still attend Horndogs Anonymous? Let’s face it, there is a 12 Step Program for every possible ailment, from Narcotics, Marijuana, Food, Sexual Compulsives, you name it. See the A-List below from Wikipedia. For some reason, however, Horndogs Anonymous was not included onto their list, probably because there are so few members. I started HA around the time of the Tiger Woods Skank-a-thon, making Tiger the… Read More »

The Jersey Shore kids are gross. Not Gross Baboons necessarily, just gross. They are so wrong in so many ways. Have you been to Florence? It is by far one of the most beautiful cities in the world. They needed to have a pack of steroid-ed gumbas trouncing around the Ponte Vecchio like I am going to the moon. Reports from Italy have the locals cringing from horror that this somehow represents Italians in the United States. And then everyone wonders why Europeans turn down their noses down at Americans. The worst part is now that the Jersey Snore kids… Read More »

UPDATE March 8, 2011: It’s official: black IS back! Don’t believe me? Check out the dark mood at Chanel. We all know that Karl Lagerfeld rules the fashion roost worldwide. So, if Karl says “Black uber alles” then so it is. And, from the looks of his somewhat over stuffed collection, black is here and hopefully to stay. When I say overstuffed, I mean the quilted, unflattering jumpsuits that will never live on the streets, but just in the magazines. For now, I am reveling in Black Power! March 7, 2011: For the past few seasons, fashion editors have been… Read More »

So Barack Obama is going to be a guest on The View. That is more than interesting. Surely, this was David Axelrod‘s idea. Considering how down the line Obama’s ratings have gotten and while I am at it, Axelrod’s recent outing on the Sunday talk shows was less than stellar. Yup, it is time for yet another achy-breaky PR blitz the goal being to Re-Hail to the Chief. Granted, this is probably the worst financial time on the planet and the Administration is doing whatever it can to help our economy, but the war in Afghanistan is putting the nail… Read More »

Announcing the newest candidates for Gross Baboon of the Year Award, Real Housewives of New Jersey, Teresa and Joe Guidice. Reading about their spendaholic, bankruptcy-inducing shenanigans made me really angry. As someone born in that fair state, the recent bevvy of Gross Baboons with New Jersey blazoned on their foreheads is enough to make anyone lie about where they hail from. We now have The Real Housewives, that lame show Jeseylicious, and even the cast of Jersey Shore, though none of them are from there, but MTV has managed to muck it up anyway. Until recently, it was Woody Allen… Read More »

These two Gross Baboons, Rachel Uchitel and Gloria Allred, are making the scene…and Rachel you will soon see raw and uncut in Playboy. – TMZ Marc Jacobs says that coke was not mine. – PAGE SIX Jennifer Hudson looks amazing. But now I hear her new album is all about dance tracks and well…just not her. Hope her new look does not get cheapened. – THAT GRAPE JUICE Oy…Woody Allen comes to the aid of Roman Polanksi? That’s like Joslyn James coming out to the support of Loredana Jolie. – D LISTED The glorious Iman and I have one thing… Read More »