“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

This is it kids… the wedding of the century. Century 21 maybe. There has been more hype about the wedding of Kim Kardashian to basketball hottie Kris Jeffries than, well, not quite the recent royal one. If Mamma Bear, Kris Jenner had her druthers, her daughter’s wedding would kick Kate Middleton and Prince William‘s in the arse. And for this wedding, it is all about the arse after all. When Kim Kardashian had to uninvite 50 guests due to lack of space, I wondered. “How and who and what?!?” In a time when our economy is dithering, and Republicans are… Read More »

As Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 steamrolled into theaters so too did Sarah Palin‘s gem classic, The Undefeated. Early reports are not looking good for Sarah’s Mariah Carey Glitter moment. The other night I was watching Sarah Palin on Fox News. Yes, I  occasionally flick over to witness what hatred is being spewed and was, as always, amazed that Sarah was in full regalia, spewing hatred. To Sarah, her regalia comes in a far more informal look that that of, let’s say, Prince William or any other military personnel. Her suit of armor conveys more of a… Read More »

If you thought Star Jones’ circus of a wedding to Al Whatsisname was annoying, hold on to your uber-sponsored hats. The cross-promotional wedding of the century is about to unfold, so stock up on your Dramamine, ’cause a fierce case of nausea is about to ensue. Unlike the wedding of the century last month between Prince William and Kate Middleton, the pending nuptials between Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries will surely reek of C and D list celebrities, lots of flat-ironed hair and enough loose curl extensions to last a lifetime. Needless to say, there will be a run on… Read More »

Fresh off the heels of the most romantic moment in couples history, I am left wondering who we have in the United States that can remotely be called our own royal couple. Enter Kristen Stewart & Robert Pattinson. Don’t look now but the slow burn of promoting the next and final-ish chapters of the Twilight Saga has begun, kicking off with an exclusive cover story in Entertainment Weekly. The timing seems intentional, can’t you hear them in the EW cover meeting now, “Let’s put Bella and Edward on the cover, America is drunk with romance thanks to the Royal Wedding“.… Read More »

Couldn’t let this one go by. Yesterday, Page Six compared the upcoming nuptials of Prince William to Kate Middleton with the pending marriage of Victoria’s Secret stunner Lily Aldridge to Kings of Leon front-man, Caleb Followill. Now, look, I am by no means an obsessive Royal Watcher, or an anarchist, nor am I hip enough to know the name of the front man for any group these days, but to put the two events in the same category, well, the word stretch seems like a stretch.… Read More »