“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

There are certain things that I do not need to know, like who designed Kate Walsh‘s jewelry when she is on some red carpet. Well, or anyone’s jewelry on a red carpet come to think of it. Sure. I like to know who designed the dresses, but the jewelry? Who cares? It’s not like the TV viewing audience is running to Google Neil Lane and ordering the diamond encrusted emerald earrings. For the most part, that information is blather. In this age of celebrity hounding, there’s way too much information out there and it is really getting nauseating. It makes no sense why Donald Trump gets as much air time as he does. I cannot wait for the new hopeful First Lady, Melania to be on QVC hawking her costume baubles while First Daughter, Ivanka, will be duking it out hustling her real bauble collection on Gilt City. Sayonara Neil Lane. The world is changing and it is beginning to smell like 3-day old leftover fish.

Reports have it that P. Diddy, or is it Puff Doody or Sean Comb Over, oh, that’s Donald Trump, well, you know who I mean, received a three car police escort this past weekend from Hammerstein Ballroom to East Orange, New Jeresey where the rapper was set to perform a song or two under a $75,000 contract. Really? Are you glad to know that? I sure as hell am not. It is THAT fact that speaks volumes as to the ills of our society, and why every schnook wants to be a star. You too, can walk around saying the N-word, encrusted in gold with diamonds in your teeth while New York City cops deliver you from paid gig to paid gig. Call me an old fogie…fine by me. But if you think that is cool, then you probably buy counterfeit LV bags on Canal Street.

In other riveting news that makes my skin crawl, Charlie Sheen received a police escort in Washington DC, this past weekend so he could get to his concert, for lack of a better term, performance wouldn’t apply. Sheen had to zip off to Los Angeles to try and get custody of his kids. How about the cops throw him in a lock down rather than deliver him in a timely fashion to spew nonsense? Eek.