There’s Was A Tiger In His Tank
Just watched the press conference with Tiger Woods, looking all pouty and apologetic for have endless amounts of glommy and poontang with a gaggle of hussies. I am not buying any of it. As you all know, golf has never been a big attraction for me, so why would I hang on every word that [...]
Move Over Loredana Jolie…Hailey Glassman Is Gross Baboon Of The Year
This is a good day for Loredana Jolie, who I crowned Gross Baboon of the Year in regards to her loose lips (get your mind out of the gutter) during the Tiger Woods fiasco. Today I am stripping Loredana of her title and giving it to Hailey Grossman, of Jon Gosselin and drunk-in-a-plant fame. Just [...]
Governor Paterson Scandal To Break
So, now I have heard everything…but this ditty takes the cake. My inside source in Albany said that New York Governor David Paterson is embroiled in a controversy that will make you chapp dein kop (hold your head in Yiddish). The New York Times is working on the story, which is said to break momentarily. [...]
Tiger and Elin…Happy At Last…ish
After what was surely the greatest media story on Earth, second to the death of Michael Jackson, The Tiger Woods Affair…rather….affairs, took an unexpected turn when Elin, the long suffering golf club aficionado, reunited with her overly poontanged husband, Tiger. In the midst of that media flurry, when the public was introduced to 13 of [...]
Celebrity / Socialite / Rachel Uchitel?!?
Celebrity / Socialite / Rachel Uchitel? Isn’t that an oxymoron? Check out this birthday invitation for the hooker / hag / collagen-filled / tranny-like thing that Tiger Woods used to date. She calls herself a celebrity / socialite. In what circles? My source told me that Rachel was Tiger’s blow-up doll. She was completely on [...]
Mistresses Anonymous
Wanna hear the most genius thing ever? It’s a new 12-Step Program called Mistresses Anonymous. No, I am not kidding. One of Tiger Woods‘ alleged mistresses, Jamie Jungers, is ready to help others. She’s been talking to TV chef Gordon Ramsay’s former alleged mistress Sarah Symonds about working on a project together. The pair plan [...]
Loredana Jolie Wins Gross Baboon Of the Year
For weeks, I have been begging the media to let dead Tigers lay…as in the case of Tiger Woods and his many whores. But as time marches on, we are still accosted by claims from these cheap hussies, case in point and the winner of Gross Baboon of the Year, Loredana Jolie…no relation to Angelina…who [...]
Last Five Minutes of Fame
As we close out the year and begin anew, let’s see who has what it takes to keep their puss in the light of media glare and what nudniks gets cast aside like a pair of old shoes. It’s a tough business, this business of show, and you have to be cunning, baffling and powerful…oh, [...]
The Happy New Year’s Stomach Ache
There are two dreadful days of the year. No, not April 15, that one I can stomach. These are the bitter pills of days. One of them is that first day back to work (or school, which caused the problem in the first place) after the long, joyous summer. I did a piece The End [...]
Justin Bieber…What?!?
How did The New York Times Style section figure out a way to stretch an article about Justin Bieber as long as it was? The guy is still in diapers for Christ’s sake. Is there really enough depth for such an extensive piece? Oh, right, the Jingle Ball, now there’s a life-altering lesson to share. [...]
Head NYC Cop, Ray Kelly, Looking Into Gosselin Break In
Am I alone here when I say, “This is what the New York City Police Commissioner Ray Kelly has time for?” Taking time to discuss the Jon Gosselin break in? Oy, vey! Let’s hope that Hailey Glassman gets even more attention from the media when we find out that she was involved in this hoax. [...]
Forgiveness Is Key
“To err is human; to forgive is divine” – Alexander Pope.
The funny thing about our hypocritical society is that we are so quick to judge and so reluctant to forgive. The United States was created by a bunch of uptight religious zealots, Puritans, and their values are still immersed in our culture. No matter how [...]
10 Things To Be Grateful For
Sure, the lackluster economy does not top the list. Nor does the endless coverage of Tiger Woods and his barrage of hookery-tramps. Today it is all about taking a deep breath and thinking back to what you have to be grateful for. Though this year was turbulent, your job is to identify where there was [...]
Can We Now Retire Tiger Woods’ Penis, Too?!?
The news has been so uninteresting, especially these days, with the Tiger Woods story monopolizing the media with his bevvy of hookers (I know, they all aren’t, but they are, Blanche) jumping face first in front of any camera that will have them. Who was it that said, “Eeny meeny miney mo, catch a Tiger [...]
The Endless Lindsay Lohan Comments
Yesterday, I Mean…What?!? shared the cover art for the upcoming issue of MUSE, the Fashionart Magazine from Milan shot by Yu Tsai, featuring Lindsay Lohan. You’d think by the the comments all over the internet that we did something malicious. You know, like the Bitches of Eastwick coming out of the woodwork, claiming that we [...]
Kernels of Dish
Today there’s just little kernels of dish that made me put together Bits and Pieces of Nonsense for you to nibble on. With Tiger still caught by his..well..not his toe…and the White House Hookers still the big story, I thought I’d just add a little here and there and wish you all a great weekend.
1) [...]
The Endlessness of Tiger and the White House Party Crashers
You know exactly what I am about to talk about: the endless coverage of the White House Party Crashers and Tiger Woods and His Stream of Dancing Ho’s. Unfortunately, these stories are not going anywhere for the next foreseeable future. Yikes, what’s Babba Wawwa (Barbara Walters) to do? Do you think she could quickly grab [...]
