“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

I’m reading the mixed reviews of last nights Oscars telecast and wondering how on Earth anyone would have said one good thing about the show. The pairing of young Hollywood’s sweethearts was such a mistake to where it reached epic proportions. I cringed through most of broadcast. Anne Hathaway has no gravitas whatsoever while James Franco was smug to the point of irritating. Sure, when Billy Crystal entered the room the audience stood to an ovation, the message being, “Help, please host this show again.” Anne Hathaway‘s song was ill-conceived, James Franco as Marilyn Monroe was a sad attempt at humor, ending with a sort of dick joke, “I got a text from Charlie Sheen.” Badum bum.

I went to one of the after parties and most people there shared my sentiments. I dare not name names, but the general consensus was that there were “no real movie stars involved in the telecast”. This, by the way, was from a couple of major movie stars. Except of course the one old timer, Kirk Douglas, who went on and on. At that point, the cringing kicked into high gear. His appearance was so catastrophic, that it made me scream from embarrassment for him. To his credit, it was not his fault, they should not have allowed for that to happen. It’s nice for old timers to participate, but please next time with dignity. And how about the ill-fitting white tuxedos for Javier Bardem and Josh Brolin? Where were these guy’s publicists. That should not have happened and heads should roll. Sorry, celebrity publicists are so good at putting the cabosh on things, that shame on you for letting that happen. I could go on and on but rather than bore you to tears, like last night’s Oscar telecast, let me leave you with this: What were those kids from Staten Island doing closing the show? It was cute, but such an after thought, and seemed like the producers would do anything to capture the young viewers who watch Glee.