“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

NEWS UPDATE (April Fools, no joke) – Before you read yesterday’s story, the big story today is that Donald Trump will get a “morning chat” kind of spot on Fox News, during Fox and Friends. Bold, brash and never bashful is his slogan. Hot. He will appear every Monday, kind of like a Monday morning quarterback. (MARCH 31, 2011) – Anyone that cannot see that Donald Trump is taking the birther stance in regards to Barack Obama does not understand the politics of the Nielsen Ratings. Donald Trump has no interest whatsoever in becoming President of the United States. The… Read More »

Now that I can admit that one of my guilty pleasures is watching Celebrity Apprentice, I am not sure that Donald Trump should run for President of the United States. Can he do both gigs? Would he put the heads of state in the board room to straighten their asses out…or better…get fired? In theory it sounds like a good idea…to run the Free World like a reality show. After all, politics is good inexpensive to produce content. But the reality of that reality show seems far fetched. What’s more, I am not sure how Melania Trump would fair against… Read More »

Look, I am by no means a prude, but have you seen the new campaign to promote the Miss USA pageant? Donlad Trump‘s properties have just had a major Victoria’s Secret overhaul. The marketing campaign just launched and all 51 contestants have traded in their pageant hair and cornball, prom gowns for that skanky, Gross Baboon of the Year look that all of Tiger Woods‘ skanks share. Now, I am all for racy, but didn’t Carrie Prejean…nutbag hypocrite extraordinaire…get chastised for being a skank? Will this new pageant action shift the talent portion of the evening? Will we see Fellatio?… Read More »

Will Donald Trump Offer Sarah Palin her last job ever as Vice President?… Read More »

Now that Donald Trump has been rendered useless post the anti-climactic finale of The Celebrity Apprentice, coupled with being booed of the political stage for sounding like a blowhard, comes his latest effort to shine the spotlight back on him. Since Ivanka just had a baby, all eyes are on her for sure so The Donald must feel like an old shoe moping around the manse. Today he bloviated over to Fox News to blather on about how Republicans should take on the big gamble and let the country risk defaulting on their loans. Well, he is a betting man,… Read More »

Donald Trump* won’t discuss his failures like Trump University. What lying sack of shit would engage in an ongoing scam they’re embroiled in? I found a long, lost draft of one of my old Op-Ed pieces dated August 2013 about @realDonald Trump.  The content is so relevant to what is currently going on with his lame, reality show version of a political campaign that I wanted to share it with you as my first Op-Ed piece of 2016. FOUND DRAFT: ORANGE IS TRYING TO BE THE NEW BLACK- 8/24/13 – Midnight Rather than be frustrated by the fact that since my bicycle accident that’s put me out of commission, Kim… Read More »

Is John Boehner grand standing about no increase in taxes or will be end up with egg on his face and make that lovely shade of orange… yellow.… Read More »

There is no reason to think that Nobel prize-winning author Gabriel García Márquez “Love in the Time of Cholera” and my desperate attempt at writing a book “Last Five Minutes of Fame” should be uttered in the same breath for literary purposes. But then again, Donald Trump shouldn’t be President of the United States, so fuck it…here goes.… Read More »

Yes, Wisconsin, get ready to be the BUTT of the Marcus and Michele Bachmann jokes. Marcus better for his own good.… Read More »

The expression, “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results” must have come from someone who year after year made New Year’s resolutions that by January 6 could not live up to their best intentions. Guilty as charged. The expression “New Year, New You” makes me chuckle since the twain from the old person becoming a new one rarely meets. That’s probably when the expression, “People Don’t Change” started.… Read More »