“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

Lindsay Lohan’s assistant Elinore just quit. Between the lost passport drama in France and the boozy anklet nonsense, she must have gone bonkers. She’s been covering for Lindsay on all fronts, as at the recent photo shoot with the Cougar Lesbian. Anyone looking for a high-stress, low paying gig in the entertainment industry? Have fun. – TMZ Would you want to live in this Gross Baboon’s uber-tacky guido farm after this new Jeresy house-frau  got her stank all over it? I have been asking to exorcise that woman out of my home state for a week now. – E ONLINE… Read More »

Announcing the newest candidates for Gross Baboon of the Year Award, Real Housewives of New Jersey, Teresa and Joe Guidice. Reading about their spendaholic, bankruptcy-inducing shenanigans made me really angry. As someone born in that fair state, the recent bevvy of Gross Baboons with New Jersey blazoned on their foreheads is enough to make anyone lie about where they hail from. We now have The Real Housewives, that lame show Jeseylicious, and even the cast of Jersey Shore, though none of them are from there, but MTV has managed to muck it up anyway. Until recently, it was Woody Allen… Read More »

These two Gross Baboons, Rachel Uchitel and Gloria Allred, are making the scene…and Rachel you will soon see raw and uncut in Playboy. – TMZ Marc Jacobs says that coke was not mine. – PAGE SIX Jennifer Hudson looks amazing. But now I hear her new album is all about dance tracks and well…just not her. Hope her new look does not get cheapened. – THAT GRAPE JUICE Oy…Woody Allen comes to the aid of Roman Polanksi? That’s like Joslyn James coming out to the support of Loredana Jolie. – D LISTED The glorious Iman and I have one thing… Read More »

Naomi is going to join Kabbalah…again…and again…and… – PAGE SIX Lisa Marie wants you to send sunflowers to Michael Jackons’s grave. Um…can you just arrange for a delivery every week and charge it to Graceland. – D LISTED Matt Lauer is a horn dog and must attend Horndogs Anonymous meetings. Stat. Sounds like he did it with the Double-mint Twins. – RADAR I love Cate Blanchett and so proud of her for wearing Alexander McQueen’s dress..that he had selected for her from beyond. – NY MAGAZINE Known Gross Baboon, Rachel Uchitel is up to her usual tricks..being a trick to… Read More »

Lindsay parties with her bodyguard. So? They must spend enough time together since the media will not leave her alone. – PAGE SIX Underage Bristol Palin out at 1 OAK, a nightclub for virgins. – NY DAILY NEWS Chaz Bono is officially a boy. – TMZ Justin Bieber has lesbian hair. Check out this site: Lesbians Who Look Like Justin Bieber. Rachel Uchitel, Gross Baboon nominee, is still in the press for reasons proving her gross babooniness. – D LISTED Click here to follow I MEAN…WHAT?!? on Twitter.… Read More »

What is the deal with Vanity Fair‘s obsession with Tiger Woods and his merry band of hookers? The new issue, on stands today, continues its coverage of the Gross Baboons that brought down America’s most boring sports superstar. The Temptation of Tiger Woods, Part Two digs deeper into this less-than-riveting story, which is sooo yesterday’s breakfast. Surely I am not alone when scratching my head wondering why Vanity Fair, my favorite (or used to be favorite) magazine would spend their resources and time on something that could have lived on thier blog and save the printed pages for more compelling… Read More »

Beyonce and Jay Z are moving to Schuylkill County, Pennsylvania. – HUFFINGTON POST Rest in peace Lynn Redgrave. You will always be my Georgy Girl. -D LISTED Pearls of wisdom from Kelly Cutrone on what not to do. – NY MAGAZINE Jessica Simpson = Michelle Obama?!? – PEOPLE A new gross baboon. Larry King’s kids’ little league coach to pose for Playgirl. – GAWKER Click here to follow I MEAN…WHAT?!? on Twitter.… Read More »

Thank goodness the train wreck that is High Society is off the air for now. Sure, like any good Samaritan, I rubber necked through the short season only because it was so shockingly wrong that you couldn’t NOT stop to watch…mouth dropped wide open. The season finale was filled with a lot of sobbing and more blather and utter nonsense than in episodes past. Mainly, a long ass ad campaign for Tinsley Mortimer‘s handbag line for Samantha Thavasa. Missing from the cluster fuck was douche-bag Jules Kirby. The CW Network must have finally edited her out once and for all… Read More »

Tavi posted a nude photo on The Style Rookie and all hell broke loose. – GAWKER Kelly Clarkson…oy. – JUST JARED The title of Countess..Schmountess Louann’s new single is Money Can’t Buy You Class. Truer words have ne’er been spoken. – HUFFINGTON POST Tito Ortiz and Jenna Jameson were doomed from the start. Low rent breeds low rent. Sorry to hear about the violence. He should be pussy whipped. – PAGE SIX That Republican (Gross Baboon) Governor from Arizona signed that strict immigration law to keep outfits like this one on that side of the Mexican border. – FASHIONISTA.COM Are… Read More »