“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

Let it be said that I Mean…What?!? called the Sarah Palin reality television show on June 12, 2009. So it was written, and so it shall be done. Today the Huffington Post reports that Sarah Palin and Mark Burnett are in cahoots with each other to bring you more endless nonsense from Wasilla. Here’s my next prediction, Mark Burnett becomes the leading campaign adviser for Sarah. This reality show will be the vehicle to slam her into the White House in 2016. Well, surely not 2012. I don’t care how many Tea Parties she hosts. And if I am right…which… Read More »

Let it be said that I called the Sarah Palin getting a Fox News deal early this summer. I wrote: “You can ask my sister Vivian, as we were watching the freakishly neurotic and overly audible Sarah Palin resignation speech on CNN, though we were shocked that they broke away from the Michael Jackson Minutia Report, that I immediately turned to her and quoted Deep Throat and said, “Follow the money”. Sarah Palin, the smart but insane sexist windbag, will write her book, which will read like a diary from an eight grader, do a massive book tour throughout the… Read More »

My head is spinning from the announcement of Bristol Palin’s new public relations firm that has launched called BSMP LLC. Since you asked, that stands for Bristol Sharon Marie Palin Lascivious Lame Crapola. Bristol has become the spokes-model for Candie’s Foundation against teenage pregnancy and abstinence, not that she would know anything about any of that. But besides the point, what next step is there for the teenage mother, really? Oh, to be a fly on the wall at the Palin compound (nee house) as they sat around trying to figure out next steps in world domination on the heels… Read More »

Are you people nuts? Sarah Palin resigned. That is the good news. What’s with the judgments and criticisms? It’s further proof that we, as a nation, consistently look a gift horse in the mouth, or, bite the hand that feeds us, whichever of those expressions apply. She’s a nut bag, she resigned, now can we please get back to which suit Michael Jackson will wear to his grave? The thing that no one really wants to say here is that Sarah Palin is beyond brilliant. Beautiful and smart. Oh, yes smart…as a whip. Not in a bookish way. But in… Read More »

The other thing about non-interesting media whores who get to the top of the heap are those who write “memoirs” or “tell-alls”. There is a vast difference between an obscure writer, compelled to tell their life story, which strikes a chord and becomes a best-seller (Elizabeth Gilbert’s Eat, Pray, Love) versus Sarah Palin’s seven-million dollar book deal that will have as much depth as my shoe. Or how about the upcoming Studio Head by Jon Peters (Barbra Streisand’s ex hairdresser turned producer) who plans to reveal dirty details about all his trysts and even several of Streisand’s trysts as well.… Read More »

Move over Marc Jacobs, Brandon Maxwell and Raf Simmons because the KKK debuts its ready-to-wear collection @NYFW. Will Anna Wintour sit front row? The White House has requested front row seats for Melania Trump, while Ivanka Kushner has refused to attend in solidarity with her Jewish husband, Jared, the nebbish.… Read More »

It’s hard to find humor in tragedy, especially before any healing has taken hold. But humor has always been my armor, my solace, my Woobie since I was a toddler and I needed to find my funny fast. I was crestfallen, felt so helpless and numb to the news of the day, which would go on to becoming a seminal moment. … Read More »

Taking bets on who will win Gross Baboon of the Year?… Read More »

What’s on the menu? The shit pie that Octavia Spencer served in the movie “The Help”.… Read More »

I have two words for the Women’s Movement: Christine Quinn! During the Golden Age of Hollywood women were heralded and revered but with that era long gone, women needed new roles models if they were to ever break from the confines of their traditional place in society. When Bella Abzug, Betty Freidan, Gloria Steinem and Helen Gurley-Brown entered the cultural landscape, there seemed to be hope for the role of women in politics and media that made the tireless work of the Suffragettes begin to finally pay off. Then Helen Reddy roared, Joan Baez claimed her place in the cosmic… Read More »