“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

With the big news that Rick Santorum does not stand a chance of becoming the Republican nominee in the Race for the White House, much of the other news in the morning papers is more nonsensical than Rick Santorum himself. Sometimes one has to take these bits and pieces of rubbish and share them with his friends. Starting with Miss Piggy, I mean Snooki, pictured above. Word is she is pregnant but in a bind because they just started filming the new reality series Snooki & JWoww, a modern day version of Laverne & Shirley. What could be less interesting… Read More »

What do Snooki and JWoww have in common with Ashley Dupré? Who is Ashely Dupré you ask? How quickly we forget our hookers with a tongue of gold. Ashley was embroiled in the Eliot Spitzer debacle. After that mess, she had a short-lived career as a columnist for the New York Post, naturally, called Ask Ashley, which dealt with everything you wanted to know about being a hooker but were afraid to ask your mother. That lasted long. So after you get booted from the Post, what’s a hooker to do? Open a lingerie shop, of course, and where better… Read More »

I did a piece on Bullying last year, around the time I was on the committee for Stomp Out Bullying. Seems like this conversation will never end so I am hereby reissuing it below. As someone who was bullied, it is my responsibility to continue to speak out against it. In regards to the Tracy Morgan flap, who surely spoke like a douche bag, he also happened to crack a hilarious joke. One of my saving graces during my bullying years was my ability to laugh in the face of danger. Humor is a great weapon against bullies. Bullies are… Read More »

The Jersey Shore kids are gross. Not Gross Baboons necessarily, just gross. They are so wrong in so many ways. Have you been to Florence? It is by far one of the most beautiful cities in the world. They needed to have a pack of steroid-ed gumbas trouncing around the Ponte Vecchio like I am going to the moon. Reports from Italy have the locals cringing from horror that this somehow represents Italians in the United States. And then everyone wonders why Europeans turn down their noses down at Americans. The worst part is now that the Jersey Snore kids… Read More »

Last season I reviewed Jersey Shore and somehow this season’s review is eerily similar. Could it be because nothing has really changed besides their location? The Return to the Jersey Shore is actually a better title for season three. Do we even call them seasons? They are more like outings. Perhaps even a series of mini-series. Jersey Shore is like Roots without the class. In Thursday night’s season opener, we met an even tackier version of Snooki, her friend Deena. What can I say besides Jersey Shore is chock-full of cursing chubby people. OK, so The Situation has good abs,… Read More »

Eric Wilson from The New York Times Style did a great piece on an experiment called Six Items Or Less a while back. Heidi Hackemer, an advertising executive and total groovy chic, decided to limit her wardrobe to six pieces, not including undergarments, accessories and workout gear for an entire month. She created a website and challenged friends to join her and within no time 250 people participated in the experiment, which was a massive success in that it was picked up by the mainstream media. Six Items or Less became a statement on where we are in relation to… Read More »

Finally, men can come out of the closet…and we are not talking about their sexuality here, rather, that men can openly say they use cosmetics and still maintain their butchness…ish. The New York Times Style section has an article about the rapidly growing market of cosmetics created exclusively for men. I love that the evolution of man boils down to his desire to maintain his youth and beauty. Not that there’s anything wrong with it. On the contrary. When men became admitted metrosexuals…though I prefer the term Manzies for this purpose…all bets were off. Suddenly, “straight” men were allowed to… Read More »

Boy, it has been way too long since I did an entry of The Nobody News. Summer is usually the best time for TNN because virtually every nobody thinks they are somebody and virtually every nobody is wrong about that. We are all entitled to a good time for sure, just let’s relax about who gets included in Wire Image and Patrick McMullan. At least in The Evening Hours by Bill Cunningham in The New York Times Style section they feature people that are doing some good by attending fundraisers. So…nobodies with money. Ouch. This edition of The Nobody News… Read More »

Last year at the MTV MOVIE AWARDS, I was astonished at the sheer stupidity of the overall content. Last night, I was less astonished at the stupidity and more amazed at what little fashion walked the red carpet. And when I say little, I mean very little dresses coupled with very little taste. Yesterday afternoon, my freind Audrey Nizen (Creative Director, Bloomingdale’s) and I were lamenting on how stylists have ruined the creativity at awards shows by playing it all too safe. Last night however, there was safety in numbers, and all of which hit the recurring theme of Hootchie… Read More »

Has the rose fallen off the bloom? These new episodes of Jersey Shore Meets Miami better be hilare. – NY DAILY NEWS Michael Lohan needs to get out of the public eye and skank off into the sunset and away from Lindsay and Ali. Meanwhile where is Orange Oprah in all of this? – US MAGAZINE Just had to share this photo that my assistant Ryan has posted on his Facebook wall of…yes…that is Britney Spears. – FACEBOOK Thank you Cathy Horyn from The New York Times, On The Runway, for sharing this gem. – YOU TUBE In other Lindsay… Read More »