“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

Donald Trump* won’t discuss his failures like Trump University. What lying sack of shit would engage in an ongoing scam they’re embroiled in? I found a long, lost draft of one of my old Op-Ed pieces dated August 2013 about @realDonald Trump.  The content is so relevant to what is currently going on with his lame, reality show version of a political campaign that I wanted to share it with you as my first Op-Ed piece of 2016. FOUND DRAFT: ORANGE IS TRYING TO BE THE NEW BLACK- 8/24/13 – Midnight Rather than be frustrated by the fact that since my bicycle accident that’s put me out of commission, Kim… Read More »

What do Mitt Romney and Donald Trump have in common? Correct. They are both Gross Baboons, for different reasons, yet gross nonetheless. This has been a busy week for The Orange Donald since his television show the Celebrity Apprentice crowned Arsenio Hall the biggest ass-kisser to The Truupmeister. The way Arsenio talked with a bow in his voice to Donald begging for the job was reminiscent of that old…well, I am not going to say it because I will get stoned…. and not in the kind of way that I like. But you get my point. If cow towing to… Read More »

Alas poor Donald… I knew him when he was white.… Read More »

Now that Donald Trump has been rendered useless post the anti-climactic finale of The Celebrity Apprentice, coupled with being booed of the political stage for sounding like a blowhard, comes his latest effort to shine the spotlight back on him. Since Ivanka just had a baby, all eyes are on her for sure so The Donald must feel like an old shoe moping around the manse. Today he bloviated over to Fox News to blather on about how Republicans should take on the big gamble and let the country risk defaulting on their loans. Well, he is a betting man,… Read More »

  Last night’s Correspondence Dinner in Washington DC featured many hilarious swipes at Donald Trump who sat in the audience. After cleaning off the dozen or so eggs off his face as a result of Obama’s real birth certificate surfacing, The Orange Donald sat in the audience and was brunt of endless jokes. If you have some time. Watch this video. Seth Myers is hilarious. httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7YGITlxfT6s… Read More »

Remember Joey Lawrence from Blossom? Yes, he was a cutie but now, look at him. Dyed black hair with shoe polish and clearly desperate for a paying gig. Joey, (out of obscurity), came to the defense of  Donald “Orange” Trump about how right he is about stuff. Well, clearly, the Celebrity Apprentice has been renewed for 3 seasons, and Donald Trump is NOT going to run for President and Joey Lawrence will be in the next season’s line-up. If I am wrong, sue me, but wanna bet?… Read More »

For those of you who have been reading I Mean…What?!? for a while, you might recall in my many Manzie Reports from last year and my observation that Gina Lollobrigida Orange was the new black. Naturally, I was being facetious because the way they were showing orange on the men’s runways in Milan and Paris, you would have to be insane to be caught dead walking the streets in half of these get ups, rather, you would get the shit kicked out of you by a pack of homophobes. Fortunately, orange in regards to menswear, never really took off, but… Read More »

NEWS UPDATE (April Fools, no joke) – Before you read yesterday’s story, the big story today is that Donald Trump will get a “morning chat” kind of spot on Fox News, during Fox and Friends. Bold, brash and never bashful is his slogan. Hot. He will appear every Monday, kind of like a Monday morning quarterback. (MARCH 31, 2011) – Anyone that cannot see that Donald Trump is taking the birther stance in regards to Barack Obama does not understand the politics of the Nielsen Ratings. Donald Trump has no interest whatsoever in becoming President of the United States. The… Read More »

Look, I am by no means a prude, but have you seen the new campaign to promote the Miss USA pageant? Donlad Trump‘s properties have just had a major Victoria’s Secret overhaul. The marketing campaign just launched and all 51 contestants have traded in their pageant hair and cornball, prom gowns for that skanky, Gross Baboon of the Year look that all of Tiger Woods‘ skanks share. Now, I am all for racy, but didn’t Carrie Prejean…nutbag hypocrite extraordinaire…get chastised for being a skank? Will this new pageant action shift the talent portion of the evening? Will we see Fellatio?… Read More »