I Mean…Gay Marriage?!?

Apr 12, 2009Breaking Newzzz
Notice the dagger and ax? Good luck.

Notice the dagger and ax? Good luck.

It’s time for me to chime in on this gay marriage issue. Clearly I am not an opponent nor am I a proponent either. I’m from the school of “live and let live”, so if two gay people want to get married…by all means, make it legal in every state, you have my blessing. I think you’re nuts…but go right ahead. The notion of marriage has always seems a bit archaic to me, straight, gay or otherwise. Monogamy is a challenging notion that defies gravity: that which is forbidden becomes obsession. Yes, there are those lovely exceptions; couples that are perfect for each other…harmonious…the ideal couple. I’ve seen that maybe twice. Other than that, it’s “Relationships are tough, I feel trapped” or “What an asshole” and “Not tonight, I’m not in the mood” as a rule of thumb. I should know, I survived an eleven year relationship.

That's my kind of gay divorcee, all stylish and carefree.

That's my kind of gay divorcee, all stylish and carefree.

I went to my first gay wedding in California in 1999. It was a gorgeous affair in Montecito (where Oprah now has a house)  attended by the couple’s 100 closest friends in a grand, Spanish-style mansion built in the 1920’s. We all stood in a large circle on the sprawling grounds as the couple went around in the circle, “honoring” each and every one of us for sharing in this momentous occasion.  I attended my first gay divorce, six months later to the day. Same house, less lavish affair. I knew then that gay marriage was a sham just like straight marriages, except for those rare exceptions like Ellen and Portia or Elton and David.

One of Iowa's main attractions.

One of Iowa's main attractions.

Everyone is applauding Iowa So guess I will too. Any state that comes out of left field to attract gay visitors gets my props. “And on your right is the Old Homo-Stead, I mean Homestead, where many a fairy was strung up in the good old days before we had to mollycoddle you homos in an effort to survive the financial crisis.”

No queen I know approved this ensemble to meet the Queen?

No queen I know approved this ensemble to meet the Queen?

Now out of Hollywood we hear grumblings from power gays (Velvet Mafia) that Obama doesn’t have enough gay people around him. I agree with the point made that “If more homosexuals were in the Obamas’ lives,” Max Mutchnick (creater of Will and Grace) said, “there is no way Michelle would have worn a twin set when she met the queen.”  You’ve gotta love gay people for wanting to throw their hat in the wedding ring (as opposed to the towel), whatever the consequences. Sure the economy sucks, but standing up for freedom of choice will always rule. It’s what makes any country great. Ask the Swedes. And while you’re at it, ask any Muslim woman in Afghanistan about that. Yikes.

Leave a Reply