Having just seen Anne Hathaway And Her Amazing Vagina’s heartbreaking rendition of I Dreamed A Dream at a screening of Les Miserables, I am vomiting from the flurry of attention being paid solely to her vagina. This is where the press needs to take a serious look in the mirror because it is this level of reporting that has effected our society and whatever bits of culture we have left. In the wake of the Connecticut shooting, frankly, we all need to look in the mirror for what it is that we do that corrupts our youth, be it through the kind of imagery we expose them to, the constant cross-marketing promotional jibber jabber and the volume of shallowness in the social media landscape.** But let’s get back to the vagina at hand for now. It has been quite a while since we have been accosted with celebrity vag shots. Not since the Golden Age of Brittany Spears and Paris Hilton did anyone poke her poker out at a camera making much hoopla. Yes, TMZ does report on those moments but who cares about a B or C or even D-List vagina? Yes, you Kathy Griffin. Please do not show that thing to the paparazzi because, quoting Roseanne Roseannadanna here, “Hey, you’re making me sick”.
Anne Hathaway is truly one of Hollywood’s sweethearts. OK, she was major annoying as the Oscars Host, but not any more so than James Franco. My point, though convoluted here, is that, “I don’t need to see that!” (NOTE: Quoting my favorite line from that short-lived HBO Series, The Comeback, starring Lisa Kudrow, who has never exposed her vagina.) Anne’s bravura turn as Fantine in Les Miz is a testament to why talented people should be famous and to hold those who deliver so much joy to be respected. Let’s blame the demise of the Hollywood Studio System where every star’s image was carefully crafted, protected and maintained as opposed to what we get now. Today everyone is vomiting on the red carpet rather than just walking on one and perhaps waving a couple of times. Instead now every farkakteh cable network & fashion blog has a Best & Worst Dressed List (I stopped my Not Best Dressed List because it got old) and dispatch some wanna-be weatherperson to get a sound bite, which has sadly become the Holy Grail or the New Gospel. The web, like cable stations hangs on every word of just about anybody in order to fill endless content time. Yikes.
Back to the vagina. We are living in an era where we are so desensitized that the only people shocked by the attention paid to Anne Hathaway And Her Amazing Vagina is Anne Hathaway And Her Amazing Vagina. We must begin to curtail some of our mindless deviant behavior. Look, I am not a Tea Party Republican here spewing nonsense. But I suggest that we pull back a little from our wanton ways.