Dancing With The Situation And Bristol Palin
Now that’s a coupling made in heaven. One desperate, unwed, teen mother, Bristol Palin, who uses the media to compete with her skanky ex-baby daddy, Levi Johnston, coupled with The Situation, a Staten Island goombah who is the most talked about character second to Snooki from MTV’s Jersey Shore. Coupling? Yes…because they will both be [...]
Levi Johnston For Mayor
Mayor Levi Johnston. Now that has a nice ring…huh? Fresh off the heels of his super-public split from Bristol Palin, baby-daddy Levi Johnston has announced from the Teen Choice Awards Blue Carpet that he will seek a run for the mayor-ship of Wasilla, Alaska. You know, that fair little town in our 49th state where [...]
Chelsea Vs. Bristol
Let’s compare the daughters of the royal families of our two political parties. The Democrats have The Clintons while the Republicans are stuck with The Palins. In this corner we have Chelsea Clinton who is educated and sophisticated and over there is Bristol Palin, a loose-lipped (and otherwise), press whore. This summer, talk of matrimony [...]
Bristol Palin and Levi Johnston Are Gross Baboons
Surely you are anticipating the I Mean…What?!? Gross Baboon of the Year Award, which will be granted later this year. Yes, move over Razzies, because the Gross Baboons are coming. For you newcomers, the GBOTY Award honors those annoying people that have graced monopolized the media to the point that it makes me say, “I [...]
Punking Sarah Palin
There’s something fishy going on here. My guess is that the unexpected news of the pending nuptials between Bristol Palin and Levi Johnston is really just a ruse and not even true. The whole story is a publicity scam generated out of Sarah Palin’s office. Well, seeing that her publicist is Bristol Palin, BSMP, LLC, [...]
The Making of a Gross Baboon
Do you ever stop to wonder how on Earth all these tacky, low-rent people have managed to claw their way into the media and take up so much of our time these days? Look no further than your mirror. What you will see there is one of the reasons that Gross Baboons have even entered [...]
Illicit Sex: The Stepping Stone Into A Media Career
Monica Lewinsky was the tip of the iceberg. It is not an exaggeration when I say that all you must do is let your orifices (orifii) run free and a media career is in your future. We now have Elliot Spitzer’s hooker-with-a-heart-of-gold Ashley Dupre as the New York Post’s Carrie Bradshaw. Jamie Jungers, the hussy [...]
Bristol Palin, Are You Kidding or Are You Kidding?!?
My head is spinning from the announcement of Bristol Palin’s new public relations firm that has launched called BSMP LLC. Since you asked, that stands for Bristol Sharon Marie Palin Lascivious Lame Crapola. Bristol has become the spokes-model for Candie’s Foundation against teenage pregnancy and abstinence, not that she would know anything about any of [...]
Head NYC Cop, Ray Kelly, Looking Into Gosselin Break In
Am I alone here when I say, “This is what the New York City Police Commissioner Ray Kelly has time for?” Taking time to discuss the Jon Gosselin break in? Oy, vey! Let’s hope that Hailey Glassman gets even more attention from the media when we find out that she was involved in this hoax. [...]
The Making of a Celebrity
Ahhh, the journey of one person’s struggle to become a celebrity. How many of these situations have we watched unfold in front of our eyes. Lost count? I sure have. But I’d like to stop and discuss a few of these people who have hit the airwaves with a thunderous boom and share my perspective. [...]
Fresh Cheeks ‘R’ Us
Not too long ago I did a piece Fresh Cheeks on cheeks. No, not the cheeks on your butt, there’s always Levi Johnston’s spread in Playgirl for that. I’m much more obsessed with the ones on your face…especially after they have been enhanced. As Christmas is upon us, I wanted to see who’s been naughty [...]
2012 – Those Mayans Must Have Read The Tabloids
Mayan Schmayan. I am beginning to feel like Chicken Little, the prophet of doom. Today, Gail Collins wrote an article in The New York Times on this same subject, which shows that the Mayan Calendar is nothing but a total buzz kill. Let’s clarify first that those Mayans never actually predicted anything. Their calendar just [...]
Last Five Minutes Of Fame
Awww. The poor little babies (a.k.a tragic media whores) that think they are all that and a bag of chips by virtue of their being tracked by the tabloid news. You have to love these people for they know not who they are. They only know who they think they are. Then we also have [...]
What A Bunch Of Hooey
Short List of Things That I Am Just Not Feeling:
Bullshit Gucci Fragrance Outtakes, (click on this link or on the image, you tell me.)
Yikes…Levi Johnston and I Are On The Same Page
So, there you have it. Levi and I have both now gone on record to say that Sarah Palin resigned her post as Governor, due to financial reasons. All these bloviators and regular folks too, I might add, who said with conviction that she will go for the 2012 presidential run are out to lunch. [...]
