Breaking Newzzz

Marcus and Michele Bachmann pledge their allegiance to the fag that he can change gays. Yeah, one night in the sack with him and you will run for the hills. Marcus has more gay face than Richard Simmons. Click image for more Bachmannese.

See what I mean?

Arnold Schwarzenegger, recent recipient of the Gross Baboon of the Year Award, landed his next starring role. No, he will not reprise Conan the Barbarian, ahem, look at the wardrobe. Instead, he is doing a western a la Clint Eastwood. "Go ahead, make my day, keep your clothes on," says IMW.

Brooke Mueller, one of the few female Gross Baboon of the Year recipients was caught seemingly red handed with a crack pipe in hand. Can someone just put her out of her misery? Who's more annoying.

Am I missing something here? Are you really looking forward to curling up on the beach with Katie Lee's memoir of her marriage to Billy Joel. The thought of their bedroom antics is making me brech. (Vomit in Yiddish.) Would somebody give me a book deal, please?

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