“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

There are certain things that I do not need to know, like who designed Kate Walsh‘s jewelry when she is on some red carpet. Well, or anyone’s jewelry on a red carpet come to think of it. Sure. I like to know who designed the dresses, but the jewelry? Who cares? It’s not like the TV viewing audience is running to Google Neil Lane and ordering the diamond encrusted emerald earrings. For the most part, that information is blather. In this age of celebrity hounding, there’s way too much information out there and it is really getting nauseating. It makes… Read More »

The film, The Social Network has forced Mark Zuckerberg to come out of the shadows, rather, his computer screen. Since then, it seems that Facebook, which I used to like, has evolved quickly into a mass marketing machine. I am accosted with invitations to utter nonsense making my email inbox seem like a spam free zone, which it is not. Gone are the good old days when long-lost eighth grade classmates would stalk me now that that they see I am no longer a fatso however they are. We see Mark Zuckerberg everywhere: Dinners, power meetings with President Obama or… Read More »

Where is the outrage? We all know by now how horrendous the Tea Party is with all their racist Tea Bagging shenanigans. But now, things are really spiraling out of control. Where in hell is this Marilyn Davenport, the Orange County Republican Central Committee slash Tea Partyer woman who sent out a mass email depicting Barack Obama as a chimpanzee? What infuriates me is that every news outlet posted the offensive, inappropriate image but no one has posted a picture of the culprit, Marilyn Davenport. We at I Mean..What?!? refused to post that image as we consider ourselves somewhat tactful… Read More »

We knew that Rachel Uchitel would not fade into the woodwork forever after taking the alleged millions of dollars from Tiger Woods in exchange for shutting her uber-collagen enhanced lips about their illicit sexual affair. The good news is, who needed her to tell us anything, my sources told me plenty. In particular, Tiger would demand sex AT LEAST three or four times a day, that she would have to drop what she was doing and run to his side…no questions asked. Clearly, the slogan “Tiger in his tank” has new meaning. Woodsy also preferred a different orifice each time,… Read More »

In a stunning politically correct move, Miss Michigan – Rima Fakih was crowned Miss USA 2010. Granted, she is beautiful, and perhaps indeed the rightful winner, but not having watched the show, I can not say whether she won hands down or whether she was crowned as a ploy to improve Arab-America relations abroad. Let’s go with the idea that she won on all her merits….riveting as they must be. Congratulations. Now, let’s go with my conspiracy theory: using the Miss USA worldwide platform as a political move on behalf of Donald Trump and Barack Obama. The plan was to… Read More »

My assistant Ryan said yesterday that he was thinking about getting a spray tan because the BCBG Max Azria store was doing an in-store promotion and he wanted to try it out. Horrifying as that sounds on every front, I implored him not to do it and hoped that he heeded my words rather than follow his heart when he left the office. The thing about spray tans is that no one looks good with them. Anything obvious is not a good thing. Most bridezillas that have adopted this practice for their wedding day look borderline insane…and orange. Orange and… Read More »

It has been a while since I have commented on The New York Times Style Section. Seemed like someone was listening and there were actual fashion related stories running in the bi-weekly Style Section…ya’d think. But today, the lead story in the Sunday Style is all about Jenny Sanford. Now, she is a lovely woman and I thoroughly sympathize with this woman. No one should be publicly scrutinized for being cheated on by their spouse. It is a shame that the public is so consumed with human foibles. Alas, we are. But of all the humans to be focused on…especially… Read More »

Yes, there is a definite shift in the air since Spring, when nelly, prissy, fembots ruled the men’s runways. There is a butcher tone overall, but Lord knows not exclusively, as that would render me out of business. Surprisingly, Junya Wantanabe, Viktor and Rolf, and even Gaspard Yurkievich all had smart showings. It’s not like I am disappointed that I can’t find what to poke fun at, I would frankly rather not have ever started this Manzie business. I am a bit Pollyanna in that I want every designer to do well. Rather than leave a hole for yet another… Read More »

Move over Marc Jacobs, Brandon Maxwell and Raf Simmons because the KKK debuts its ready-to-wear collection @NYFW. Will Anna Wintour sit front row? The White House has requested front row seats for Melania Trump, while Ivanka Kushner has refused to attend in solidarity with her Jewish husband, Jared, the nebbish.… Read More »

Did you hear the collective gasp of disbelief when the media reported you and Kanye West (of all people) were summoned to the gold version of a glass house? Please, do tell how your business meeting with @realDonaldTrump went the other day. I, like millions, am dying to know. … Read More »