“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

Sung to the tune of Laverne & Shirley One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. Shapiro, schlemazel, hasenfeffer incorporated. She’s gonna do it. Give her any chance, she’ll take it. Give her any rule, she’ll break it. She’s gonna make her dreams come true. Doin’ it her way. Will she go, won’t she go. I have a headache. Any way you slice it, the media is hanging on Lindsay Lohan‘s every move anxiously awaiting for her to speak. And just who she will she be spilling her guts to, besides her Twitter followers? Surely she has locked in some… Read More »

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A8FUgN4xYoc… Read More »

Would everybody just get over themselves about LeBron James‘ choice to move out of Cleveland and down to Miami? The reaction to his signing up with the Miami Heat and to live his life in the best way he seems fit is ridiculously over-the-top. New Yorkers are taking it as a personal snub. And the people in Cleveland are burning jerseys with his name on them. Relax. The guy has the world by the balls and his balls want to live in warm weather with a chance at winning championships. Seriously, who crowned anybody the ruler of his universe? The… Read More »

The Spring 11 shows came to a close in Milan, and overall there were great, sexy, safe collections sprinkled in with those few designers that love…and are committed to…Manzies. There were noticeably less mandals than last year, more blue than black and less quirky man-hats, which makes me very happy. Yes, there were Mad Men, but more along the likes of Coo-Coo, rather than Jon Hamm lookalikes. The Milan Maznie Report ends by featuring these few designers who we can live happily ever after…without.… Read More »

Mariah Carey’s vet is suing her. What?!? – D LISTED Madonna’s Macy’s collection. First sketches. Awww. – IN STYLE Lindsay Lohan’s assistant has been offered bickaroos for telling her inside story. zzzz – PAGE SIX… Read More »

Lindsay Lohan is over Jorge Perez because of the way she is being portrayed on Bravo’s Double Exposure. – HUFFNGTON POST What on Earth is this? – D-LISTED Lady Gaga’s Candies were too tight. – D LISTED Carrie Fisher is filming her one woman show for HBO this weekend. Wishful Drinking on Gay Pride Weekend. Now there’s kismet. – HUFF POST The Gays have role models. – GAWKER… Read More »

Lindsay Lohan’s assistant Elinore just quit. Between the lost passport drama in France and the boozy anklet nonsense, she must have gone bonkers. She’s been covering for Lindsay on all fronts, as at the recent photo shoot with the Cougar Lesbian. Anyone looking for a high-stress, low paying gig in the entertainment industry? Have fun. – TMZ Would you want to live in this Gross Baboon’s uber-tacky guido farm after this new Jeresy house-frau  got her stank all over it? I have been asking to exorcise that woman out of my home state for a week now. – E ONLINE… Read More »

Merle Ginsberg (Editor-in-Cheif, fashionrules.com) and I continue our cross continental SKYPE dialogue and compare notes on the CFDA Awards. MERLE: Shall we start with worst dressed? ABE: Is there a better place to start? How about the Olsen Twins? MERLE: Dumpster chic. ABE: I saw this fantastic video look book that The Row did on style.com, it featured nothing like those schmattas. They are such fashion icons….why I don’t know…but they are and they never get the red carpet down. MERLE: They are too young and too thin, to hide under all this fabric at a black tie. I also… Read More »

Last year at the MTV MOVIE AWARDS, I was astonished at the sheer stupidity of the overall content. Last night, I was less astonished at the stupidity and more amazed at what little fashion walked the red carpet. And when I say little, I mean very little dresses coupled with very little taste. Yesterday afternoon, my freind Audrey Nizen (Creative Director, Bloomingdale’s) and I were lamenting on how stylists have ruined the creativity at awards shows by playing it all too safe. Last night however, there was safety in numbers, and all of which hit the recurring theme of Hootchie… Read More »