“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

Each summer, flocks of people migrate east to The Hamptons. Like birds, they set up nests, arrange their beach wardrobes and busy themselves with all sorts of relaxing activities. Here is a typical day in the life of a Hamptonite: sit in traffic walk around ad nauseam have cocktails or dinner at whatever has been suggested by the media shop for things that otherwise would not be purchased share bedrooms with total strangers…as a living situation, not a sexual encounter congregate with people they otherwise despise desperately try to meet a mate pretend to be nice to potential mates stand… Read More »

Are you people nuts? Sarah Palin resigned. That is the good news. What’s with the judgments and criticisms? It’s further proof that we, as a nation, consistently look a gift horse in the mouth, or, bite the hand that feeds us, whichever of those expressions apply. She’s a nut bag, she resigned, now can we please get back to which suit Michael Jackson will wear to his grave? The thing that no one really wants to say here is that Sarah Palin is beyond brilliant. Beautiful and smart. Oh, yes smart…as a whip. Not in a bookish way. But in… Read More »

George Bernard Shaw wrote, “Youth Is Wasted On The Young”. And after watching the first couple of episodes of NYC Prep, that expression still holds true…and in the case of these pompous noodniks…in spades. There is a column in the The New York Times Style section about the show, which fails to mention just how incredibly horrendous these kids are. The stark reality of these NYC Prepsters, as is the case with the characters on Gossip Girl, is that they all want to rush through their youth and act like grown-ups. I am from the Peter Pan era where the… Read More »

Excuse me…but…can we please, at least, begin to move on from this Michael Jackson Celebrity Death Match? I know, it’s sad. Death as a concept is sad. Yes, I believe in the after-life, but that doesn’t mean I want to get there any sooner than need be. So, for now, death is still sad. But I think it is time to move on. Ok, day 1, the shock. I get it, lots of news. Day 2, details emerge, some stories abound. Day 3, the family speaks. I remember when my father died, also at 50 years of age, I couldn’t… Read More »

Reading about the new Monkey Bar and the obsession that Graydon Carter has regarding who sits where kind of gives me the willies. I don’t know why. Part of me would like to think that he’s busy editing Vanity Fair, the magazine I look forward to reading each month, though I will say it has been lackluster as of late. Could there be some kind of correlation? This month, with everyone’s hero Johnny Depp on the cover, the magazine is so thin, it’s like one of those glossy handouts in the Hamptons. And lo and behold, there’s a story about… Read More »

Maybe I’ve been hiding under a rock lately…nope. Maybe I’ve been so consumed with work…nope. Maybe I’m so focused on living my life one day at a time…nope. Can’t quite put my finger on how I could have possibly missed the emergence of the newest category of celebrity…the Celebrity Gardener. Now, I lived in Los Angeles long enough to know that every celebrity has a gardener. But I didn’t realize that automatically made them Celebrity Gardeners. It doesn’t, right? So, how did that expression get coined? Especially here in New York  where we really don’t have gardens, for the most… Read More »

It is most fitting that the Paris men’s fashion shows are staged while in New York City, Gay Pride is in full regalia. Sunday, while the androgynous models sauntered down the runway, the few nelly customers that will likely buy the Manzie looks were sashaying down Fifth Avenue in all their Sasha Fierceness. I did notice however, that Manzies were everywhere in New York both on and off the gay runway. So now, I have officially changed the name of Gay Pride to “Manzies and Tranzies and Bears…Oh My!!!” Though I liked much in most collections that were shown on… Read More »

Just when you thought it was safe for Manzies to come out of the closet in droves from Milan, comes the newest crop of shows from Paris. And what a difference a city makes. Milan was uber-butch in comparison. Before I do my show and tell, the one major trend that kept appearing on the catwalks was “Men as women.” It seems to me that the statement is: since men fucked up our global economy (for the most part), why not dress them now as women so they feel castrated for their actions. At least that’s what I am taking… Read More »

How many times this week have you heard people (be it in the media or around your office) say, “Farrah Fawcett upstaged Ed McMahon’s death, then Michael Jackson upstaged Farrah’s death”. I mean…what?!? Am I crazy or does this sound preposterous. I get how huge a story the Michael Jackson drug overdose is…and the unexpected demise takes over the media coverage. But to say that one person’s death upstages another is such disrespectful nonsense. And one that annoys the shit out of me. First of all, when people “upstage” it’s most likely intentional. Just ask Hollywood legend, Bette Davis who… Read More »

Just about everyone on Earth has been affected by Michael Jackson…somehow. Whether it’s your fondest musical memories, your endless, desperate, unsuccessful attempts to do the “moonwalk”, singing songs from Thriller in the shower to test your vocal chops or dancing in the mirror, alone in your room, grabbing your crotch. Michael Jackson is there, in your system, in your heart, and surely everywhere in the pop culture vernacular. We all adored him until we began to despise him. Reading all the reports, headlines, glowing life stories, endless news coverage of the late, great King of Pop, I could not help… Read More »