“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

Look, even hats get to be famous these days. This floppy, ribbon hat is flying off the shelves after Sandra Bullock was snapped wearing it. – E.T. Skanks Incorporated is about to have their first Board meeting. Michelle McGee, Hailey Glassman and Gina Lynn will be together doing some skanky nonsense. – PAGE 6 The Church is comparing the Pope’s situation to the persecution of the Jews during WWII. Shown here, Marlene Lugosi Pope Benedict (Arnold) loves this hat because it covers her his ears. – NY TIMES Though she was 2 1/2 hours late for her recent concert in… Read More »

Am I that old where I can no longer appreciate teenyboppers? Am I that cranky and jaded that there’s no summoning up the adulation for a Twinkie that sings? Am I alone here? When I was young, yes, 4,000 years ago, we also had heartthrobs that swept the nation. We might have started that phenomenon actually. Well, Elvis did and that was before my time. But Elvis changed music as did The Beatles. They changed everything beyond music, too, like personal style and while they were at it, the entire culture. One can surely understand screaming for them. But I… Read More »

(Click on image for full story) You gotta love Chelsea Handler for saying what I have been saying forever about wanting Kate Gosselin’s Fifteen Minutes of Fame to end. – NY Daily News The iPad obsession is boring. I will definitely get one…when they get over themselves. It’s not a cancer treatment…its landfill. Relax. At least David Letterman get’s the joke. Russian Fashion Week features the pride of Borat. Say hello to the cast of “Jerseylicious.” New Jersey is about to have a hey dey…as in “Hey, you tsawkin’ tsoo me?” Oy, Lindsay, get your roots done. Are you on… Read More »

Let’s face it kids, when I ask: ABE: Who wears a matching red hat with red Prada shoes and elaborate dresses? YOU: Dame Edna? ABE: No. YOU: Any of the contestants on RuPaul’s Drag Race? ABE: No. Give up? Here’s a hint. He turns a blind eye to child molesters and is the top dog of the Catholic church. YOU: Justin Bieber? ABE: No, you maroon. It’s the Pope, the Holy Pontiff, His Grace in the Glass Menagerie. Nice reputation, Marlene Pope Benedict XVI. I mean…really…would you let this guy, if he was not the Pope, anywhere near your kids?… Read More »

If you haven’t seen images from the recent volcano in Iceland, check this out. My freind Steinunn and I were chatting on SKYPE and she showed this website and please click on this image to see more of the volcanic fierceness.… Read More »

TMZ is reporting a sort of Chicken Little prophecy regarding the future of Lindsay Lohan. Her friends are very concerned that Linday’s partying is spiraling out of control and fear for her life. Well, whatever the case, I do hope that is not the case. Then again…who wouldn’t fall flat on their face in those ridiculous heels? Girl…Tory Burch flats for you.… Read More »

My assistant Ryan said yesterday that he was thinking about getting a spray tan because the BCBG Max Azria store was doing an in-store promotion and he wanted to try it out. Horrifying as that sounds on every front, I implored him not to do it and hoped that he heeded my words rather than follow his heart when he left the office. The thing about spray tans is that no one looks good with them. Anything obvious is not a good thing. Most bridezillas that have adopted this practice for their wedding day look borderline insane…and orange. Orange and… Read More »

Let it be said that I Mean…What?!? called the Sarah Palin reality television show on June 12, 2009. So it was written, and so it shall be done. Today the Huffington Post reports that Sarah Palin and Mark Burnett are in cahoots with each other to bring you more endless nonsense from Wasilla. Here’s my next prediction, Mark Burnett becomes the leading campaign adviser for Sarah. This reality show will be the vehicle to slam her into the White House in 2016. Well, surely not 2012. I don’t care how many Tea Parties she hosts. And if I am right…which… Read More »

Here’s a situation that has me riveted…in a guilty pleasure kind of way…kind of like watching…The Bachelor: On the Wings of Love. Where you really can’t believe that you got whooped up into wasting two hours of your precious time on earth watching this stupid show, yet, totally hoping that anyone but Vienna wins…and horrified when she did. Hence, you lost all respect for Jake. In that same way, I am wondering what Sandra Bullock and Elin Nordegren will do about their cheating husbands? Will they or won’t they forgive them…or will they just leave? Who hasn’t made their minds… Read More »

Awww…how cute. Usher just bought Justin Bieber a Range Rover for his 16th birthday. Tell me, can we expect to see an episode of MTV’s My Super Sweet 16 for this monumental occasion? Yikes. Speaking of yikes…watch this video featuring Cody, the whiny, little tangerine that has Bieber Fever.… Read More »