More Bla Bla on "bachmann, palin"

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The gloves are off and the cat fight begins between Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann, the Doublemint Twins of the Tea Party. Neither zealot has officially entered the race yet, but they are already taking jabs at each other through their hired mouth pieces. What is more brilliant than that? Brilliant because as I predicted months ago, there will be no harmony with this duet. It is similar to the similarities of Bryce Dallas Howard and Jessica Chastain. It is hard to tell them apart, too. In March, when the Charlie Sheen meltdown was monopolizing the airwaves, I wrote: The… Read More »

The past few days while Charlie Sheen has been monopolizing the airwaves, the happy homemakers, Sarah (Cross-Hair) Palin and Michele (Cross-Eyed) Bachmann have been doing their darndest to get some face time on the boob tube. Naturally, Fox News to the rescue, where Ms. Blabbermouth #1 has been spewing venomous insults about the Obama Administration, while her potential Presidential rival Ms. Blabbermouth #2 was doing the same. The slanderous comments such as “Gangster Government” is so racially motivated, that it makes John Galliano look like Mother Teresa. Now, these two bimbettes have synced up their talking points to the point… Read More »

Don’t you love people who shoot themselves in the foot? I sure do. It makes me very happy and few things make me very happy. Like a Percocet and a cup of coffee first thing in the morning. Or watching the snow fall from my bedroom window, which overlooks downtown Manhattan. Red Carpet arrivals make me happy, too, and last night’s SAG Awards was no exception. Winner is Mila Kunis. Let’s hear it for Alexander McQueen‘s busiest week. But in the case of Michele Bachmann and Sarah Palin, their perfunctory need to yattle off at the mouth–spewing Tea Party nonsense–well,… Read More »

Face it...

Awwww, poor Michelle Bachmann. She’s running neck and neck with the losers Rick Santorum and Jon Huntsman for Biggest Loser in recent polls. Now, look, I am the first one to call that woman a crackpot and her gay husband Marcus Bachmann, a closet case. But to refresh your memory, I started the Michelle Bachmann for President campaign in May (see below), knowing full well that she guarantees Barack Obama’s second term. Well, I am still happy to support Bachmann for President. Please join me. Listening to old bug eyes yattle on and on how she would stop giving food… Read More »

Now here's a face only Michele Bachmann could love.

Would you go to Iowa to see Randy Travis perform? Let me sweeten the pie and tell you that he will be the featured performer at Michele Bachmann‘s Straw Poll Hootenanny. Yes, Michele has looped in the skeletor of country music to entice folks to come to her tent, while her husband Marcus offers free personal styling tips—while turning you straight. Team Bachmann also promises to provide barbecue, beverages and an air-conditioned tent where Tea Bagger zealots can relax, hang out and get brainwashed into thinking that Bachmann stands a chance. Talk about getting cluck for your buck. What is… Read More »

Eek.

If anyone needs to hire ID-PR, Slate or 42 West, it is Michele Bachmann. Say what you want about those pushy celebrity publicists, but you will NEVER see a cover shot of Jake Gyllenhaal looking like he is tweaking, or Jennifer Aniston looking like she is plugged into a socket. Granted, celebrity publicists have gotten a “not great” reputation as being bitchy and annoying, but they do their job, and usually very well. There are plenty of not-interesting talent that celebrity publicists get tons of coverage on. I won’t get into it now (January Jones) so I can stay on… Read More »

the-undefeated-movie-poster_374x514

Look out Iowa, here she comes, barreling down the pike for more heart felt aggrandizing. Yup, Sarah Palin is loading up that I’m Not Going Anywhere Tour Bus and hightailing across the plains to head Michele Bachmann off at the pass. (And her little dog, Marcus, too.) Sarah has tasted the fruits of our national landscape—no, not the edible ones from the Great Plains—rather, from the bully pulpit and media glare of the national stage… and she is hungry for more. Sarah Palin is a garden variety addict, maybe not with drugs, but she is clearly addicted to the spotlight.… Read More »

Wha'ts with the thinning hair on Sarah Palin?

Poor Sarah Palin. Now that she has been marginalized and stuffed back in her Wasilla box, she is desperately trying to claw her way back into some sort of rhetorical relevance by spewing hatred on, what else, Fox News. Any money bet that she had her finger in the reality show deal for Beehive, the hair salon that is credited for her up-dos. The new show, Big Hair Alaska will air on TLC, the network that brought you Sarah Palin killing animals and winking. Coincidence? I don’t think so. The other thing is that she is on contract with Fox… Read More »

If you have long brown hair and a cutesy act, you will be sued. Look out Maria Menounos.

Sometimes reading the morning news reminds me of the Enchanted Forest when Dorothy and the three caballeros are in search of the Land of Oz, only to be threatened by the pending doom of lions and tigers and bears. In that same vain, reading through today’s headlines, the three ladies who otherwise just lunch, Sarah Palin, Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton are doing to me what those animals did to our heroes from The Wizard of Oz. Kim Kardashian is suing Old Navy for their use of a singer/model, Melissa Molinaro, who kinda looks like her.… Read More »

Glamorpuss is one thing, glamorpuss bloviator is another.

As Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 steamrolled into theaters so too did Sarah Palin‘s gem classic, The Undefeated. Early reports are not looking good for Sarah’s Mariah Carey Glitter moment. The other night I was watching Sarah Palin on Fox News. Yes, I  occasionally flick over to witness what hatred is being spewed and was, as always, amazed that Sarah was in full regalia, spewing hatred. To Sarah, her regalia comes in a far more informal look that that of, let’s say, Prince William or any other military personnel. Her suit of armor conveys more of a… Read More »