“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

Remember when the Oscars meant something? Families would gather round their one television set, snacks piled high. It was the signature event of the movie industry, when actors still held a mystique because they were so inaccessible. Their lifestyles were imagined rather than paraded for the media, only few would speak out in support of injustices or charitable causes and we were kept at arms length from knowing too much what went on behind closed doors. Boy has that all changed. Now, we know so much about everyone that is nominated for each award, that by the time the Oscar… Read More »

Now that David Patterson has officially backed out of the race, look who’s planning to take a stab as Governator for the State of New York? Remember the Elliot Spitzer, Client 9, Ashley Dupre saga? Yes, that old, tired story. Well, the madame in that trinella, Kristin Davis, no, not the Kristin Davis from Sex and the City, but the one pictured above is ready to take her stand. Davis was the only one in that case that went to the slammer for her dirty dealings. I am sure while Kristin stewed in prison, she hatched this riveting plan to… Read More »

There are some things we should not stand for, and horrible fashion is one of them. Celebrity designers is another thing, but let’s stick with today’s program, which is horrible fashion shown in irrelevant cities that host Fashion Weeks. Let me start with Williamsburg Fashion Weekend. At least Brooklyn knows they could never sustain a week (or a day) but that does not excuse their vain, sad, little attempt to make their fashion mark. Yeah, yeah, Williamsburg is amazing…if you live there. Say what you want, but Williamsburg is better in theory. But this ongoing desperate attempt to prove that… Read More »

Just watched the press conference with Tiger Woods, looking all pouty and apologetic for have endless amounts of glommy and poontang with a gaggle of hussies. I am not buying any of it. As you all know, golf has never been a big attraction for me, so why would I hang on every word that someone that wears pleated slacks. Anyway, I could only imagine what Rachel Uchitel (Lips McGilicutty) was doing during this press conference. She, who was his weekend sex toy, who reveled in Tiger’s salacious requests for constant sexual favors between golf holes. (Stop) Who wouldn’t want… Read More »

This is a good day for Loredana Jolie, who I crowned Gross Baboon of the Year in regards to her loose lips (get your mind out of the gutter) during the Tiger Woods fiasco. Today I am stripping Loredana of her title and giving it to Hailey Grossman, of Jon Gosselin and drunk-in-a-plant fame. Just to refresh your memories, I crowned Loredana with the title Gross Baboon of the Year when she was flapping her gums about the book she was going to write about the Tiger Woods tryst, and alluding to Tiger’s homosexual activities. Loredana, dear…just because you were… Read More »

So, now I have heard everything…but this ditty takes the cake. My inside source in Albany said that New York Governor David Paterson is embroiled in a controversy that will make you chapp dein kop (hold your head in Yiddish). The New York Times is working on the story, which is said to break momentarily. Apparently, the apple didn’t fall far from the Elliot Spitzer tree and there is a rumor that the Governor used public funds to cop drugs (blow) and hookers (blow). Can you stand it? Blow squared? I would like to think this is not true…but since… Read More »

Nice doo, doll. Say what you want about Jake “Heartthrob” Gyllenhaal, but I think he is beyond vanilla. In this Prince of Persia promo shot, he is more Princess of Persia, with the pouty-lip, deer-caught-in-a-headlights look, which is reminiscent of Loredana Jolie. See what I mean?… Read More »

Beyoncé Heat by trentisthenewpink“> Check out this uber-sexy dress that Beyonce is sporting for her new fragrance, Heat. And heat there is. JWOW heat, if you ask me. Is there any difference between these two items of clothing? NO! The JWOW Blouse is beyond. I am not clear if she designed it or is just selling it on her website…but I say to you…run…now…click on her site. I love that she calls this one item her clothing line. You just have to love her for that. Because, really…what else do you need in your wardrobe besides a half-yard of a… Read More »

Celebrity / Socialite / Rachel Uchitel? Isn’t that an oxymoron? Check out this birthday invitation for the hooker / hag / collagen-filled / tranny-like thing that Tiger Woods used to date. She calls herself a celebrity / socialite. In what circles? My source told me that Rachel was Tiger’s blow-up doll. She was completely on call every time he got a boner and that he exhausted every one of her orifices. Like a hooker. Once on a trip, she kept calling my friend, between boners, in an attempt to get up for air. But as the story goes his sexual… Read More »

Yes, there is a definite shift in the air since Spring, when nelly, prissy, fembots ruled the men’s runways. There is a butcher tone overall, but Lord knows not exclusively, as that would render me out of business. Surprisingly, Junya Wantanabe, Viktor and Rolf, and even Gaspard Yurkievich all had smart showings. It’s not like I am disappointed that I can’t find what to poke fun at, I would frankly rather not have ever started this Manzie business. I am a bit Pollyanna in that I want every designer to do well. Rather than leave a hole for yet another… Read More »