“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

Missoni has taken over the airwaves. The overwhelming marketing of the Missoni-Target collection has made me dizzy, perhaps optical illusions and fashion should not go hand in hand. This weekend at a friends house, I used the Missoni (collection) bath towels, which did not dry my hands. The paper thin towels moved the water droplets around but did not fully absorb. Granted, the stripes and colors were fun to look at, but if a towel does not act like a towel then I take issue. The Spring ’12 collection went down the Milan runway and from the looks of things,… Read More »

In the Golden Days of Hollywood, no one cared about much besides the stars of stage and screen. Tallulah Bankhead, Bette Davis, Katherine Hepburn, Clark Cable, the list goes on. Seems like we have graduated (or what’s the opposite of that?) to be far more concerned with the whereabouts and goings on of the lowest of lowbrows of our society. The Nobody Newzzz is back and we have plenty to crow about. Crow as in old crow because the top story this week is about the Salahis. You will remember Michaele and Tartiq Salahi, that couple of Gross Baboons who… Read More »

UPDATE TO THAT UPDATE: Merv Griffin Productions has commit to Courtney Stodden to produce her reality show, Skank and Grampa (working title). The realness is getting realer than real, but really? Who is going to watch this nonsense? They have not locked in a network yet. Have they tried the Playboy Channel? Other classic television shows on Playboy TV are Brooklyn Kinda Love and The Stash. UPDATE TO THE UPDATE: Guess who is getting a reality show? Umm….give up? You got that right. The May-September romance of these two self-involved looney tunes will birth a new reality series following these… Read More »

The war in the Middle East will have nothing on the war that is kicking off at retail between wanna-be-perceived-as fashion retailers Sears versus K-Mart. Think what you want about television stars being the next big fashion statement, but between the similarities between the Kardashian Kollection at Sears and the Sofia Vergara collection at K-Mart, you can just give me a friggen break. Fast fashion is perhaps the saddest thing that happened to the industry. Sure, affordable style is a good thing. But it has run a muck. So, what, now, you can have a supporting role on an overrated… Read More »

Just when you thought it was safe to come out from under the falling dead celebrity fashion collections—I mean where is Zooey Deschanel‘s crap, Katie Homes’ nonsense and Sarah Jessica Parker for Halston—comes the worst bit of fashion news yet. Gossip Girl, that Shakespearean television show is getting its own fashion collection. Yes, this is true. Now we will have to live through the painful process of extensive cross-marketing between retailers and a list of television shows-turned-fashion designers. I cannot wait to see what Fox, CBS, NBC, ABC and Bravo have in store for us. As you may know, the… Read More »

Lindsay Lohan has been stirring up the pot this week in New York and the thing is, after hearing about last night’s glass throwing incident at the V Magazine party in the Boom Boom Room, perhaps the media should stop referring to her at Actress, Lindsay Lohan. If Miss Thing doesn’t start working soon, as an actress, then that adjective will no longer be applicable. Douche bag will be more suitable. Girl, snap out of it. Now.… Read More »

Spring ’12 is shaping up to be the war of the print worlds. How is a buyer to determine which print will sell better than another? It is a daunting task to decide which blown out floral will be the better choice. As if with two fashion show venues, The Tents @ Lincoln Center & Made (Milk), coupled with the endless other indie fashion show locations, then you have the challenge of determining what to buy. I gotta hand it to the buyers who have to navigate that kaleidoscope of color coupled with no taxis and feeling like you might… Read More »

Months after the horrendous mistake of John Galliano‘s life, comes the verdict. The French court found him guilty of “public insults based on origin, religious affiliation, race or ethnicity” stemming from two separate incidents at a bar in Le Marais, his neighborhood in Paris. He is ordered to pay court fees, no jail time and a few other little remarks here and there, which puts an end this disastrous chapter of Galliano’s life. I, for one, am glad this is over. You can see my comments and sentiments below, but what impresses me here is how French court really does… Read More »

Ever since Madonna jumped into the schmatta business, it has been a head-scratcher. Why the lame move from musical icon to tween celebrity-turned-fashion-designer extraordinaire? Sure, she’s made some cute moves like hiring Taylor Momsen, the Gossip Girl cast-off as the original face of the label, Material Girl. But overall, Madonna & Schmatta was just an odd lot job lot. The news that LA Triumph, a garmento company in California, is suing Madonna, claiming the rights to the name Material Girl is really annoying. Sure, the tween Macy’s fest is somewhat beneath my Material Girl but Madonna is and will always… Read More »

No one really celebrates Labor Day. Sure, we take off that Monday, but since Labor Day represents the end of summer and the return to school, who is celebrating? Mourning is more like it. Since kindergarten, the “End of Summer Stomach Ache” began on the Sunday afternoon before Labor Day. Though I am generations away from school age, this year I am sick to my stomach a few hours earlier than usual. Between the economic news and the political climate, I am nauseous from what I see and hear. According to Wikipedia: Labor Day became a federal holiday in 1894,… Read More »