“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

  Politicians are like an “IT” bag, and each season, there is a new “must-have”. This Presidential season is going to be the Chanel of wind bags. You find me one candidate for President of the United States, present company and President included, that is not prone to hypocrisy, and I will pay you money. Seriously, this is a one time offer, as I am not a betting man. No one on Earth can present the case for a candidate who does not talk out of both sides of their mouth and other orifices, in order to please the masses.… Read More »

Now that the S & P has downgraded our credit rating, I would like to mention that this is the same organization that approved all the credit swaps and hanky panky that lead to the demise of the Free World as we know it. The Standard & Poor (whose name is apropos) took this position based on our contentious political theater during the debt ceiling debate. This is unprecedented and shocking because those who sit in judgment shall not judge. And if the Lord didn’t actually say that, well, he did now. With the downgrade in place, the Democrats, yes,… Read More »

Poor Sarah Palin. Now that she has been marginalized and stuffed back in her Wasilla box, she is desperately trying to claw her way back into some sort of rhetorical relevance by spewing hatred on, what else, Fox News. Any money bet that she had her finger in the reality show deal for Beehive, the hair salon that is credited for her up-dos. The new show, Big Hair Alaska will air on TLC, the network that brought you Sarah Palin killing animals and winking. Coincidence? I don’t think so. The other thing is that she is on contract with Fox… Read More »

In a stunning turn of events, last night Barack Obama overshadowed Donald Trump and The Celebrity Apprentice as NBC cut away from the final moments of the show to announce that Osama Bin Laden was dead. In light of this, I suspect that Donald Trump will have a double bone to pick with the President. In an effort to maintain his spot in the news cycle, Donald Trump still has a few more weeks of The Celebrity Apprentice to promote and what better way than at the expense of Barack Obama? You can hear the headlines now. Why did they… Read More »

Where is the outrage? We all know by now how horrendous the Tea Party is with all their racist Tea Bagging shenanigans. But now, things are really spiraling out of control. Where in hell is this Marilyn Davenport, the Orange County Republican Central Committee slash Tea Partyer woman who sent out a mass email depicting Barack Obama as a chimpanzee? What infuriates me is that every news outlet posted the offensive, inappropriate image but no one has posted a picture of the culprit, Marilyn Davenport. We at I Mean..What?!? refused to post that image as we consider ourselves somewhat tactful… Read More »

Arrest me for making this comparison, but both of these outspoken fringe-element characters, Pastor Terry Jones, being incredibly evil, and Jimmy McMillan, The Rent Is Too Damn High Guy, being hilariously right have one unmistakable thing in common: their facial hair. When these guys are not in front of the cameras spewing utter nonsense–again, one being extraordinarily evil, like Charles Manson evil, versus hilarious, like will-never-get-elected hilarious–they must be members of Barbershop Quartets. What Rosa Parks was to the Civil Rights Movement, Terry Jones is to the War On Terror. What Terry Jones did by burning the Koran will be… Read More »

NEWS UPDATE (April Fools, no joke) – Before you read yesterday’s story, the big story today is that Donald Trump will get a “morning chat” kind of spot on Fox News, during Fox and Friends. Bold, brash and never bashful is his slogan. Hot. He will appear every Monday, kind of like a Monday morning quarterback. (MARCH 31, 2011) – Anyone that cannot see that Donald Trump is taking the birther stance in regards to Barack Obama does not understand the politics of the Nielsen Ratings. Donald Trump has no interest whatsoever in becoming President of the United States. The… Read More »

Don’t you love people who shoot themselves in the foot? I sure do. It makes me very happy and few things make me very happy. Like a Percocet and a cup of coffee first thing in the morning. Or watching the snow fall from my bedroom window, which overlooks downtown Manhattan. Red Carpet arrivals make me happy, too, and last night’s SAG Awards was no exception. Winner is Mila Kunis. Let’s hear it for Alexander McQueen‘s busiest week. But in the case of Michele Bachmann and Sarah Palin, their perfunctory need to yattle off at the mouth–spewing Tea Party nonsense–well,… Read More »

I went to a parochial school and remember one of my tougher teachers yelling at a little kid who was crying for some reason or another to, “Stop that blubbering”. No, it was not directed at me. Though I distinctly remember that the use of the word “blubbering” made me so uncomfortable because I was a chubby kid. Blubbering stings. I have not heard that term used since then, but it seems most appropriate to describe the new leaders of the Republican Party. Could you just imagine what these born again Tea Baggers, Mitch McConnell and John Boehner would say… Read More »

I am a Democrat. I am also furious. Not that we lost the House. We all should have known that was coming and been psychologically prepared for the landslide. Seeing Barack Obama dumbfounded the next day at the press conference proves that, as he even referred to, “the glass bubble” has kept him at arms length from the American people. After all, every bloviator accuses him of that or being an “aloof Harvard professor”. Say what you want about Obama, but first look at this website that documents all the great things he has done in the last two years.… Read More »