“I Mean…What?!?” – Abe Gurko

After a very heavy weekend of serious issues hanging over our heads…Ground Zero + Mosque = Nightmare, let’s take a respite from hard news. Today the airwaves are filled with a bunch of nobodies. In light of our failing economy, endless wars, catastrophe in Pakistan, we could use a dose of mindless blather. No? Let’s see who rates as major nobodies.

Patti Stranger, the Millionaire Matchmaker, proves the classic case of do as I say, not as I do. The orange person recently broke off her engagement to NJB, Andy Friedman. He didn't want kids? I think it is more of a case that he thought she and Snooki were the same color.

See what I mean. Who want to marry someone orange?

Speaking of washed up at the jersey Shore, Ronnie Ortiz was arrested again. So, what, each season he gets to show us what a low life he is?

Who on earth goes to see Tila Tequila perform, and I don't mean sexually, I mean singing? At least these kids had the good sense to thrwo shit at her...literally...they threw doody at the stage. Everyone's a critic.

Uch...those pursed lip puss. If you read my entry from last week about Steven Slater guy, I am sure I was 100% right. And he was offered a reality show already.

Violet Kowal is the newest member of the Nobody News sprinkles with a member ship to the Gross Baboon of the Year nominees. And guess who she hired? Yup...Madam Gloria Allred.

You know, Dina Lohan should really clam up. For her to go on The Today Show and bla bla bla about Lindsay is really annoying.

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